Bio
AV Flox is a Peruvian transplant living in Los Angeles. She is the editrix-in-command of Sex and the 405, a site that shows you what your newspaper w...
 
 
 
 

Most Popular

BlogHer Bedroom Video Chat: Get Ready to Talk About Sex, Love and Social Networks

  • Share This Post
  • Pin It
  • 14
  • Sparkle (
    )
     

It's time to put sex on the calendar once again! BlogHer Bedroom is coming back this Thursday.

This week, I your fearless misadventuress, will be discussing social networks and relationships -- and answering your questions about your own travails in the madness of this world where, more and more, the analog is colliding with the digital.

AV Flox

Once again this week, we're going to be picking one of you to receive a $100 Visa gift card. To enter the contest, just leave a comment on this post asking a question about this week's show topic: dating, loving, fighting and breaking up in terms of social media.

In March, OnlineSchools collected some interesting data regarding trends in online dating: 40 million Americans date online. That doesn't surprise me in the least –- I have been using Twitter for dating for over a year.

As more people get on social networks, dating online has become a little more than just a quick search for singles within 20 miles. Now we're loving, living, fighting and breaking up online. Many of us for the first time.

What are the rules? Is it OK to check out what a crush is doing or where he's going by what he posts? How do you deal with passive-aggressive status messages from a significant other? Should you "unfriend" an ex on Facebook?

Go ahead and ask me your own questions in the comments so I can expand on them during the show -- and so we can pick a winner (more deets about this are below)!

So pencil me in this Thursday at 8:00 p.m. Pacific, 11:00 p.m. Eastern for the live video chat of BlogHer Bedroom. You can watch and chat here on this page at BlogHer.com. It'll be like having happy hour with the girls, but in comfort of your own home and without the uncomfortable footwear. How can you resist?

GIVEAWAY DETAILS

Win a $100 Visa gift card by asking a question related to sex, love and social media in the comments of this post. You have until Thursday, 11:30 p.m. Eastern, 8:30 p.m. Pacific, to leave a comment. The winner will be contacted before the following week's video chat, and we will make the public announcement during the next show. Click here to read the official rules. Ready, set, go!

POST-SHOW FOOD FOR THOUGHT

I mentioned a couple of articles during the webchat, so I thought I would link them here, along with other posts and articles I thought might answer some of the questions we addressed.

Let's Fall In Love (Or Hook-Up, Or Pillow-Fight, Or... Whatever) Online
Exploring the different ways to go about meeting people and dating online, from Craigslist to Match.com to social networks not made specifically for dating.

Baby, You Don't Poke Me Anymore
How social media confounds and complicates relationships, from ambient awareness to the Facebook "poke."

So, Tell Me Everything I Know About You
The cautionary tale of a woman who Googled before a date and then found herself in a bit of a predicament when the man she was seeing realized she already knew pretty much everything.

When Couples Fight on Facebook, Everyone Knows the Score
At 400 million members and growing, Facebook might just replace restaurants as the go-to place for couples to cause a scene.

The Valleywag Guide to Restoring Your Privacy on Facebook
Last year, Facebook reworked its privacy settings to give us more control. The result was profiles being defaulted to public. How are your settings set up? This guide will help you understand how to set up a Facebook account that doesn't give you too many privacy-related nosebleeds.

Blackbox Republic: "It's Complicated" Gets Simple
A social network that charges, uses a voucher system, has epic privacy settings in place and takes quality very, very seriously -- without losing sight of the fun.

How To Get Laid With Twitter
Old-school methods of getting to know someone through their blogs and Facebook profiles is a large investment as far as time goes–and time is a luxury not all of us have. With Twitter, you can find and engage hundreds of people in your network. So how do you do it?

E-Stalking Your Way to Hot Sex
Can you tell if someone is going to be good in bed by how they tweet? According to Kiki, you can. Six things to consider when e-stalking your crush.

Our Secret Lives On The Web
Philosophy professor Aaron Ben-Zeév tackles the question of the dualism of online interaction: greater anonymity and

  • 14
  • Sparkle (
    )
     

Comments

Post comment as twitter logo facebook logo
Sort: Newest | Oldest
Anonymous8 5 pts

What are some of the more creative ways that couples use social media to spice up their relationship or marriage? Do they email back and forth to resolve fights? Send messages by day about what they want that night?

Sarah Baron
www.anonymous8.com ( http://www.anonymous8.com )

mjnbrn 5 pts

Hello,
My wife gets on facebook and myspace alot more than I do. Also, it seems like she talks to her exboyfriends on these sites quite a bit. Should I be worried at all about these contacts, or should I just brush it off?

heyburt 5 pts

Did Jesse James get his money's worth?

ButlerGeorge 5 pts

Twitter has a lot of advantages over other social media as a dating (or screening) tool, but there's still a potentially big difference between interacting online and doing so in "meatspace." How do you make sure the connections you make 140 characters at a time continue to work when you take things to a "real world" level?

craftyb 5 pts

How do you keep your personal life separate from your business life online? I'd hate to have a client run into a digital faux pas... but editing yourself can keep you from expressing yourself fully.

dashoff 5 pts

I'm curious if people are more or less jealous nowadays, considering how easy it is to contact old flames. (Or to Facebook-stalk your significant other's exes.)

I'm seriously so glad this nonsense wasn't around when I was in college! I think I'd have gone mad.

sugarkane 5 pts

How do you tell a guy is good in bed, in 140 characters?

Sugar Kane

AngieMarie 5 pts

What's the best way to deal with a spouse who objects to you accepting a friend request from an ex? Is it better to be rude and decline the request from the former flame than upset the significant other?

Scandalous 5 pts

As AV already knows, I tend to date quite a bit and am very active online. However I run into a problem and am curious about her thoughts about it:

How do you balance privacy and connections in a budding relationship with someone that does not believe in utilizing social networks or public blogging?

I have tried anonymity and code names, in addition to transparency- I'm very open and upfront that I write about lovers before we even become involved. I've found men become entranced initially and even after a couple of posts but then they freak.

Do tell me your strategy on this new little perk accompanying online dating and the analog.

Denise 9 pts moderator

Can't wait for av to answer that. Hah.

Denise
BlogHer Community Manager

Flamingo House Happenings ( http://www.flamingohouse.net/ )

JennaHatfield 9 pts

In my (boring, married) social circle, I see a lot of wives on social media and no husbands. As such, how much can/should we bitch about our spouses without worrying about repercussions. An example: my husband reads my twitter but tweets on his account once every three or so months.

Also, how much should Denise flirt with me before TW kicks her in the knee? (Inside joke. HOLLA!)

Jenna Hatfield (@FireMom ( http://twitter.com/FireMom )), from Stop, Drop and Blog ( http://stopdropandblog.com ) and The Chronicles of Munchkin Land ( http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com ), is a freelance writer and newspaper photographer.

TW 6 pts

Unless you want to get voted off the island-best not to banter in your work online community.

Retro-Food.com

cathymccaughan 5 pts

Is sexy banter via social media inappropriate or ingenious?