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Sparkle (0)
The fifth anniversary of my sister's death is approaching in just two days. I've experienced this date four times already but it still causes difficulites for me. I know that July is coming in early June when my mind refuses to acknowledge the date. June 15, 21, 28...days just go by without my mind actually registering the number.
I work hard to prepare myself for July 29, the day my sister left this earth. I schedule days off from work and plan extensive projects and distracting day trips, but the sadness is still there, lurking in the distance. I can feel my body bracing - almost fearing the day. My body refuses to sleep. Maybe if the calendar doesn't move forward I won't have to face the dreaded day? And yet, here it is - 48 hours away.
I have discovered effective ways to channel the emotions that are begging to be released. I write poetry and journal alot during this time. I have also found that meditation is a wonderful way to truly feel what I am feeling and let those emotions emerge and then release. Sometimes I express my feelings really loud through my electric guitar or bass. I crank up the amplifier and let the musical vibrations carry away my pain. Or I'll listen to my favorite dark and sad CDs and cry my eyes out!
Does anyone else out there do creative things with their grief? I'd love to hear about them!
