Getting past yourself
Finally, after many years of chasing after a life that I thought I was supposed to have in order to make money, I have found the life I really should be living.
I gave up my 9-5 job and I am now working on my writing and artwork. It has been a long difficult haul. This is mostly due to years of feeling inadequate and also fear of failure. I was never expected to go anywhere with my life according to my parents. To them sending us kids to school was free day care. I don’t know that they intentionally set us up for failure; I think that it was more of an issue of not knowing how to deal with their own lives and issues. And throwing five kids into the mix was a perfect recipe for disaster.
But I have learned to let go of all of that and stop laying blame on anything or anyone for my failures. Against all odds I went to college and I have both photography and writing degrees. I wonder what my parents think as they look down on me know. That is; if they made it up there to heaven.
I am 47 years old and after a lot of contemplation and deep soul searching I found that everything that has happened in my life good and bad has brought me to the place I am right now. And I am unbelievably happy. Without enduring all of the crap in the past I would not be who I am now. And I like who I am now.
So now that I am in this comfy spot I am using my time to enjoy the rest of my journey by creating art, writing and enjoying time with my family. You can see some things I have been working on at liferidedesigns.blogspot.com and at liferidedesigns.com.