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Sparkle (1)
In September of 2007, Andy Rooney wrote an article called:
"Andy Rooney on Women Over Forty."
Mr. Rooney basically said :
Women over 40 will not ask you what you think, because they don't care what you think.
Women over 40 are dignified. They won't have a screaming match with you and would just shoot you if they thought they could get away with it.
Older women are generous with praise because they know what it feels like to be unappreciated.
A woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.
Older women are forthright and honest. If you are a jerk, they'll tell you.
I am an older woman and appreciate what Mr. Rooney said, and I agree, but it took me years of anguish and confusion to get here.
As a child I lived with alcoholism and abuse. I grew up with no self confidence and no self esteem. I started my life by being negative.
In my 20's, I danced to other people's tunes and "obeyed" when I was told to do something. I wasn't allowed to have a thought or opinion of my own. I never thought of standing up for myself.
In my 30's I made stupid mistakes and decisions. I could be manipulated very easily and tried to make everyone happy, even at my own expense.
In my 40's I started to grow up. I gained wisdom and understanding, then I'd lose it. I'd gain some of it back, and lose it again. My life was never constant or secure.
In my 50's I ended a 24 year marriage that had fallen apart and fell a horrible, deep depression that , quite honestly, I'm surprised I lived through. I wasted 6 years of my life. No one is worth that kind of mental anguish.
I am in my 60's and let me tell you what I've learned.
I am responsible for my life. If I make a mistake, I am the one that has to answer for it and live with it, so I make every effort to make wise decisions.
I will help you, but don't push me around. I will stand up for myself.
I don't hurt people and I don't like people that do. I don't talk about people or spread gossip, and I expect the same respect.
I don't judge people. I have no idea what their lives have been like, are like now, or what they have lived through. Judging is God's job, not mine.
I've learned that I don't give a hoot what other people's opinions of me are. I spent too many years worrying about it and it just isn't important. This is MY life.
I've learned that I am valuable and a good person. I am generous, kind.and compassionate.I have a good heart.
I've learned that I have a good mind. I've learned I have talents and skills.
I've learned to listen and think before I speak or offer advice.
I've learned to be positive about this journey of life.
I've learned to laugh at myself, with no ridicule.
I've learned that I can work to make money and take care of myself. I can buy a home, shovel my own snow and cut my own grass. I can pay my bills, drive a car that's paid for, paint a room, make a quilt and operate my own power tools.
Most of all, I've learned that God has always loved and protected me. Through all of the bad years He was always by my side. I've learned that had I looked to Him for confirmation, I would have never been without self confidence and self esteem. I've learned if I had gone to the Lord in prayer, I would have not made unwise decisions or so many mistakes. I've learned that I am grateful to him and wish I had always put Him first.....and I've learned that it doesn't matter how you start this journey of life. What matters is that you finish it, holding His hand.
I love being "an older woman."
Thank you, Andy.
