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Born in Ukraine and raised in San Francisco, I am now struggling to stay sane in the suburbs of the Biggest Little City (where there is no Dim Sum)....
 
 
 
 

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Leaving for America

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I could never have imagined it without a little help.

Coconut tree with my iphone In my child’s mind, I pictured a mound of sand, a palm tree (with coconuts!) and my grandparents clinging to it to survive. I spent weeks fretting about how we would swim there and alternatively about how we would all fit!

Thanks to a couple of photographs and some letters sent across the great ocean, a new vision began to take shape. No longer picturing a tiny speck of an island, I now imagined towering buildings, lush landscapes with trees as far as the eye could see, strange looking birds, even stranger looking people and a bridge made of solid gold!

I longed for it. This place I had never been to. This country I had only read about. This magical land with fruit in the winter time, jeans in all sizes and no lines at the store counter!

“A Barbie there costs six dollars!”

“That doesn’t sound like much, I bet you could save for a few in no time.”

“Will you promise to send us back one?”

I promised. “Of course!” I promised them all. I’d write letters and learn English and send them all back Beatles cassette-tapes and Barbies and Bubble gum. I was so excited, I could hardly stand it!

“When will we leave?

“Soon, so soon. You won’t even have to start school because we’re leaving any day now.”

I waited patiently.

The weeks turned into months. My friends all started first grade. I roamed the playground alone until the babies would let out of nursery school. I’d organize them into a merry band of thieves and send them on daring missions to the corner store. “I’m going to America and you’re going to miss me so much. You’ll cry even!” I told my pint-sized pack of hooligans.

Each night, I packed my suitcase, folding my clothes neatly and carefully selecting the two toys and three books my parents said I could take with me. “Any day now,” I would tell myself, giddy with anticipation.

The school year ended and a new one was beginning. I begged to go and this time my parents agreed. Every week it seemed a classmate would leave to America, to Israel or to Germany.

But still we stayed. “Any day,” I would keep telling myself, but I stopped packing.

My aunt, uncle and cousins moved out of our apartment. From twelve people there only five of us left. It was quiet and the bathroom was always available when you needed it. Where was the fun in that?

There were rations for milk and soap. One day I went to the corner store and they were out of bread. So was the store in the town square and the ’super’ store down by the movie theater.

My grandma called to say the earth shook over there and she had broken her leg.

I started having nightmares. America was a small island again, but the ground was unstable and the palm tree split down the middle.

I would play this one song, the lyrics “goodbye America, though I’ve never laid eyes on you” would always make me cry. I’d get myself worked up to a state bordering on hysteria and finally sleep.

My great-grandmother, the woman who raised me, had a stroke and died.

I no longer cared if we ever left for America.

By the time we landed at 11:15pm on January 11th, 1991 at San Francisco International Airport, I barely even registered it; that indeed, my whole world had shifted.

 

~

When not offering her unsolicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

Photo Credit: mackro

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Cheryl @ Mommypants 5 pts

I remember this post so, so well. Because of the beauty and longing. All of it.

So thrilled to see it featured here, my friend!

Mommypants ( http://www.mommypants.com/ )

shesuggests 5 pts

So sweet of you to stop by and read it again!

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

AwayWeGoNancy 5 pts

I loved this the first time around. Your edits work really well, making it even more elegant an powerful.

A lovely piece. Congrats.

Nancy also blogs about parenting, writing, and assorted nonsense at Away We Go. ( http://www.npoj.blogspot.com ) You can follow her on Twitter:  @AwayWeGoNancy.

shesuggests 5 pts

Thank you for indulging me and reading it again!

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

shesuggests 5 pts

I am glad to have found America and lots of wonderful friends, online and off. Thank you Ilana!

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

shesuggests 5 pts

Oh just you wait til I get onto the playgrounds in America and make all the children flee with my herring filled lunches.

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

shesuggests 5 pts

Oh you should ask your friend to write down her story, it will undoubtedly be VERY different from mine.

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

jw27 5 pts

Oh I loved this even more the second time I read it. Beautiful, beautiful work and so good to see you here.

I blog about life, loss and autism at Four Plus An Angel ( http://fourplusanangel.com ).  You can also reach me on twitter @fourplusanangel.

Mommy Shorts 5 pts

Having just discovered you myself, I am so pleased you found America at last!

I hope your dreams of a better life were eventually reignited. We might not have bridges made of gold but we've got bagels!

Ilana is a NYC based working mom, read more from her on Mommy Shorts ( http://www.mommyshorts.com ).

E.M. 5 pts

The thought of you alone on the playground breaks my heart. Such wonderful words my friend. Always.

Frelle 5 pts

simply beautiful. what a wonderful look at your life before you moved, the emotions in particular as you struggled to believe it would happen were powerful to me. I have a good friend who came to America at 18 from Uganda, and your story makes me want to ask her to write hers down. You really did nail this prompt, and it was my introduction to your writing when you linked up that week! Congratulations on your syndication!

shesuggests 5 pts

My giant ego is now double inflated from you saying I'm talented. Floating off into the atmosphere.....

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

shesuggests 5 pts

Just wait until childhood fantasy meets reality of life in America, bitter indeed.

Thank you for your lovely thoughts.

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

shesuggests 5 pts

"My story" sounds so official!
Thank you so much.

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

shesuggests 5 pts

Oh girl you have not stood in line until you've stood in a Soviet era line! Trust me.

Thank you so much for your kind words.

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

shesuggests 5 pts

Or impatience as the case may be.

Thanks Tiff!

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

kris@prettyalltrue.com 5 pts

You know how much I loved this post when it went up over on your blog. So delighted to see it here! Congratulations!

You have amazing talent.

Love this post so very much.

Kris

Pretty All True ( http://www.prettyalltrue.com/ )

AnnsRants 5 pts

I love the way we see childhood fantasy bump up against reality so effectively and bitterly in this piece.

Sweet and very sad.

www.annsrants.com ( http://www.annsrants.com )

www.listentoyourmothershow.com ( http://www.listentoyourmothershow.com )

gamommy2two 5 pts

Yuliya, this was awesome. Your story fascinates me every time I read a bit of it. Thank you for sharing with us.

 Lindsay's ramblings can be found at www.lindsayblogs.com ( http://www.lindsayblogs.com/ ) and on Twitter ( http://twitter.com/Lindsay_Blogs ) or Facebook ( http://www.facebook.com/justmyblog ).

shesuggests 5 pts

Thank you so much, I so appreciate you reading and sharing your thoughts (and sparkles)

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

BooyahsMomma 5 pts

Sweet, funny, touching and poignant. I loved this post the first time around. And I saw things in it the second time around that I missed.

Also? I wish it really was true that you could always find jeans in your size and no lines at the store counters. :)

Booyah's Momma
www.chipandbobo.com ( http://www.chipandbobo.com )

tiffontheverge 5 pts

beautiful story! i can feel you waiting with a child's patience...so wonderfully written.

shesuggests 5 pts

Gigi you are awesome, if it wasn't for you Back to school back to blogging I don't know where I'd be today!~

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

jpcross 5 pts

Congratulations on getting your post on BlogHer!!

I loved this story. Such a difficult thing for a child... leaving everything you ever knew to move to a strange new place.

I sparkled!!

gigi927 5 pts

So proud of you, gal!!!

P.S. I'm taking credit for introducing you to some of the lovelies who are now your closest friends :) xoxo

Read my snappish take on parenting, life, pop culture and blogging at KludgyMom ( http://www.kludgymom.com ). Or connect with me on Twitter @AKludgyMom ( http://www.twitter.com/akludgymom )!

shesuggests 5 pts

Thank you so much Shanon, such a lovely compliment.

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

sharmstro 5 pts

I am a fairly new follower and reader of yours. I love your writing. Very much. You capture memories so well. And you paint lovely pictures with your words.

Congrats on being featured here! Well deserved!

Shanon

shesuggests 5 pts

Thank you Kelley, that is so sweet. I do like to think she'd be proud.

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

KelleysBreakRoom 5 pts

What an emotional story! I was getting excited with you, then disappointed, then really sad. I am sorry you lost your great-grandmother, the woman who raised you. I know she would be so proud of you today!

shesuggests 5 pts

I'm so glad you liked it Galit!

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

shesuggests 5 pts

And that's how I decided to keep blogging, blame ScaryMommy everyone she said I need to write a Part2, 3, and on and on....

Thank you for reading Jill, much appreciated!

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

shesuggests 5 pts

Thank you for reading it twice!

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

shesuggests 5 pts

Life adventures, I like the sound of that!

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

Galit Breen 5 pts

This was so beautifully written, Yulia! I literally hung onto every word!

These Little Waves ( http://theselittlewaves.com )

scarymommy 5 pts

I loved reading this!!
Such a fantastic story! Is there a part 2? And, 3? 4? 5?

Jill presents an honest take on motherhood; the good, the bad and the scary at her blog, ScaryMommy.com ( http://www.scarymommy.com/ ).

2old2tap 5 pts

This post is just as lovely here as the first time I read it. Contests. On being here!

Sluiter Nation 5 pts

Oh friend! I love LOVE to see you over here! I love going on your life adventures as you tell them!

Katie Sluiter writes about life as a working mom at Sluiter Nation ( http://sluiternation.com ), writes creatively at Exploded Moments ( http://explodedmoments.wordpress.com ), and reviews books at ( http://katiesbookcase.com )

shesuggests 5 pts

Natalie I am so grateful you are here! Thank you friend!

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

Natalie H 5 pts

Congrats on being here Yuliya!This is one of my favorite pieces of yours; it's just lovely.

Natalie writes at Mommy of a Monster and Twins ( http://www.mommyofamonster.com ) about her day-to-day life and the chaos that comes with raising a 3 year old and 1 year old twins.

shesuggests 5 pts

I paint pictures! I like the sound of that...so many career options I had never considered before....
Thank you friend.

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

shesuggests 5 pts

Hey look it's you again!
And my baby gang is silent, they will not rat me out.

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

shesuggests 5 pts

Too tight is just right!

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

in_mandyland 5 pts

Oh lady! You paint such a picture with your words. The hope, the fear, the uncertainty.

Wonderful, wonderful post, friend. Sparkles coming your way.

Mandy Dawson can also be found blogging away In Mandyland ( http://inmandyland.com ).

funnyorsnot 5 pts

Jeans may come in all sizes in America, but mine are always tight.

Kids don't do will with anticipation, but they do adapt pretty easily. I enjoyed this view on immigration. I can also tell you are a natural leader. What did you have your baby gang steal?

funnyorsnot 5 pts

Jeans may come in all sizes in America, but mine are always tight.

Kids don't do will with anticipation, but they do adapt pretty easily. I enjoyed this view on immigration. I can also tell you are a natural leader. What did you have your baby gang steal?

shesuggests 5 pts

Those Red Dress Club ladies really give good prompt don't they? Thanks for being here Erin!

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

erin margolin 5 pts

The Twit: http://twitter.com/ErinMargolin
The NEW Blog: www.erinmargolin.com ( http://www.erinmargolin.com )

This was absolutely lovely. I thought you did an incredible job of describing the child's point of view. The anticipation was palpable.

I sparkled you!
xoxoxo

erin@ErinMargolin

shesuggests 5 pts

The comment so nice it's on here twice!

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

shesuggests 5 pts

Could not have done it without you and the Red Dress Club, really and truly.

When not offering her unsoclicited opinion to friends and strangers alike, Yuliya can be found documenting her life journey at http://www.shesuggests.com/

Cheryl @ Mommypants 5 pts

This is one of my favorite pieces by you. I love, love, love how you tell the tale through a child's eyes.

Love seeing you here, too..

xo

Mommypants ( http://www.mommypants.com/ )