The Guide to the Obama Presidency

Living in a country where you don’t like the
leadership is difficult, I’ll admit. However, it is NOT impossible.
This is a quick and simple guide for non-Obama supporters to make it
through the next few weeks, months, and years.

First, remember, it isn’t forever. Chances are that in four, eight,
or twelve years, you will probably have a leader you respect in office.
Typically, party swaps happen every eight or twelve years. Usually by
the eighth year, someone in the administration has done something to
upset enough people that he gets his party out of office. Now,
sometimes, this does not really happen on a popular vote level, and we
end up seeing things like Supreme Courts and hanging chads. It is worse
for the country when things like that happen than it is for someone to
win “fair and square”.

Next, you need to stock up. First, get journals because you’re going
to want to document every moment of utter hatred or annoyance towards
this person. Eventually, you will write less and less and end up
laughing more and more. Then, get some pens, preferably gel pens. They
write smoother. And finally chocolate and/or ice cream. Perhaps other
comfort foods. It’s called the “Election 20″, much like the “Freshman
15″.

Next, prepare yourself for staying up on Saturday nights for SNL. It
may interfere with your sense of morality on some skits, but it will be
worth it for the skits on Obama and the commentary that will be done on
Weekend Update. If you have church the next morning, then I would
recommend that you get a VCR or DVR and record the shows. (For the
record, supporters will be laughing, too.)

Another thing, you will need is to stay in the country. Threatening
to leave does not help the situation. I’ve threatened twice, and it
just made me feel kind of foolish when I didn’t get all my stuff ready
for my long trip to Canada. Oh, and if you do decide to leave, then
pick a country that has political interests similar to yours. I’m
guessing that if you hate Obama, you would probably choose something
more conservative, so Canada, Australia, and Britain are all out. Not
so sure about Ireland and New Zealand, as I don’t have as many contacts
there. Foreign language skills might be healthy. I know, learn Russian,
go there, learn what strife is. Or, go to Israel, and learn the
realities of terrorism.

Let me think. What else?

Oh, yes, there is something that you shall do. Stay calm. Making
threatening remarks about the President Elect will get you nowhere,
except maybe jail, depending on if the Secret Service catches on. (And
they likely will.) You see, vehemently hating people does not get you
anywhere.

Remember, when dealing with the other side, that we have feelings,
too. We are human. We are not responsible for everything that happens
that you do not like. Yes, we voted for “the wrong person” in your
eyes, but that does not mean we are at fault for your issues with the
candidate. We, for the most part, did not blame you for the badness we
associate with Bush. We do not appreciate the blame for the badness
that you associate with Clinton and that you will likely associate with
Obama.

Another thing, the Senate is not filibuster-proof. Though Democrats
came out in high numbers, we did not capture as many seats as it would
have taken to ensure that we had the Senate in our grasps completely.
So, you still have a little hope there.

Remember to pray. It helps. And don’t just pray for your safety,
your party, and the like. Pray for Obama, too, because, unfortunately,
not everyone will take the not making threats thing seriously. And,
though I have never lived through an assassination, I hear that that
can be a seriously bad thing for a country, regardless of how you
voted. Also, pray for him because he is your leader. You would be
shocked to know that I have prayed for Bush, his safety, and for
guidance for him. I tried to have faith with him. And if I can do that
for someone who is so different from me, then you can for someone so
different for you.

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