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Amongst the ladies of BlogHer, a bout of semi-secret self-flagellation seems to have broken out in regards to enjoying various commercials that ran during the Super Bowl. Sure, the comments are full of self-confident women standing up for their opinions, explaining why they liked an ad or found it offensive. Behind the scenes, though, e-mails have been flying. For example, Mir at Would Coulda Shoulda gave me permission to share her thoughts:
I confess that the E-trade "MilkaWHATic??" ad actually made me laugh really hard. I guess according to Salon I'm supposed to feel oppressed and marginalized by it, but I thought it was a decent follow-on to last year's E-trade spots.
Hopefully y'all won't make me turn in my feminist badge for this.
A few others echoed her sentiments, sharing what they liked even though they "shouldn't" and offering to file away their feminist cards as a result. This made me cry. Ladies! There aren't enough people out there who would even admit that they have feminist cards or badges! Please do not put them away! The "movement" needs you. We need people who like a lot of different things and share their perspectives on why. Or, more simply, feminists are totally allowed to have guilty pleasures.
Feminists would be really, really boring people with whom I would not want to spend any time if we couldn't indulge in some crappy pop culture that is "bad" for us. Like Jory Des Jardin, I love me some Millionaire Matchmaker. I also find Tucker Max weirdly charming and amusing. These things cause much ire amongst other feminists, but I can't help it. One of my best feminist chums, Alex Elliot, is a huge fan of Lifetime movies. I would rather poke my eyes out with hot coals than watch another white-damsel-in-distress flick, but who I am to tell her that she's not a good feminist if she likes them?
BlogHer CE Nordette Adams linked to a British ad that could easily make all the hairs on a shaggy feminist's legs stand up at Whose shoes are these anyway? So it trades on some stereotypes. Eh. Life is complicated. Nobody appointed me the judge of who gets to be in the feminist club and who doesn't, but in my humble opinion, the entertainment value Nordette derives from the "Battle of the Sexes" commercial is just another part of what makes her a person I'm glad I know. (And the ad struck me as hilarious also.)
On the other hand, I can see that there are times when one feminist's guilty pleasure is another's horror. Sometimes the lines are blurry, but in other instances, it seems more clear to me. Corinna at A Celebration of Curves saw a segment on the TMZ show -- which usually focuses on celebrity gossip -- that made her realize that it was not a "harmless guilty pleasure." She wrote:
You’ll see a hilarious video of a very drunk or drugged, unidentified young woman being dragged across the street and thrown into the back of a car by an unidentified man. A man in the TMZ “newsroom” comments, “This is the most wasted girl I’ve ever seen on a video. She’s literally getting dragged to some guy’s car in a gas station. (ha ha ha) I’m hoping he knows her.” This comment is followed by laughter from several voices. Back to the footage of the drunk girl being dragged and another guy says, “Also known as Last Seen Footage!” Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.
Yeah, there’s nothing funnier than women being abducted.
Seriously, I love gossip as much as the next feminist, but I'm not laughing at this, either. Maybe someone else finds it funny. I won't judge her for that or make her turn in her feminist badge, but I would wonder why. Just like another woman might wonder what I see in Tucker Max. And that's why I think that feminists should keep the discussion going on what they find titillating, interesting, erotic, funny, insightful, or just plain entertaining. Because if we just try to police each other's desires and interests all the time, we'll learn nothing. Now I shall step off my soapbox and watch some crappy TV.
Suzanne also blogs at Campaign for Unshaved Snatch (CUSS) &
