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I have been writing about family, parenting, politics and religion since 2000. My work has appeared on Babble.com, Literary Mama.com, in Adoptive Fam...
 
 
 
 

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Halloween: You Wanna See Something Scary? Give My Kid a Piece of Candy.

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This is the first year my kids are aware of the existence of Halloween.  My older daughter, somewhere north of four and a half, is in school for the first time, where Halloween themes began to permeate school activities two weeks ago.  There will be a class party and a "Halloween Parade", which, I gather, is marching around the building in a costume.

And thus, this year, the lid has been blown off of Halloween.

Halloween has us in a tricky spot.  Being, as it is about two things, 1. costumes and 2. candy, it puts us in a bind.  Our girls love them some dress-up play.  They dress up almost every day during their copious free play time at home, excitedly running to show me their latest disguises throughout the morning.  My older daughter loves a stage; loves to exaggerate her emotions theatrically and be the center of attention (for better or worse).  The costume aspect of Halloween is certain to delight her.

But the candy is a problem.  It's not that I have anything against sugary deliciousness.  It's not that I oppose special rules--or the lifting of rules--during special times like holidays.  But candy is a real problem for my older daughter.  Five minutes after ingesting sugar, she goes through something like David Banner goes through when he gets annoyed.  But instead of the Incredible Hulk, she turns into the Anti-Nat.  My sweet child becomes whiney, willful and completely out-of-her-mind hyperactive.

In our regular life, we've all but stopped eating cookies, cake, pie, candy--even things like muffins and scones have been demoted to very occasional exceptions to our daily diet.  No one feels deprived of treats.  Whole fruit doesn't have the same effect on my kid as refined sugar, especially when accompanied by milk or cheese.  So my girls are used to getting a lot of fruit.  Nothing makes them happier than a bowl of frozen blueberries.

But holidays--maybe especially Halloween bring all kinds of treats into their lives that my kids aren't used to.  And now that she's in school, my four-year old is surrounded by kids who are used to occasional sugary snacks.  But what may be fine for them (and for my younger daughter, in fact) just isn't good for her.

So the Halloween dilemma for me is how to participate and enjoy the holiday with minimal sugar.  And without making my kid feel like the one who's getting left out of the fun.

My solution?  Give up.  Well, sort of.

It's not a peanut allergy.  A piece of candy won't put my daughter in the emergency room.  Her teachers know to expect a Jekyll-to-Hyde personality shift after sugar.  And she's got enough school under belt now that they will know it isn't the "real" her if she acts horrifically at the class party.

Meanwhile, we won't be trick-or-treating, but we will be gathering at the neighbor's house for a low-key party of preschoolers in our condo complex.  They will probably be cookies.  There may be candy.  I'll tank my kids up on cheese before we go and hope for the best.

I am beginning to realize that it's true what I have read and until now only understood theoretically--that parenting is a slow process of letting go.  I hope that as she grows, my daughter will learn to make choices about food--and everything else, for that matter--that attend to her personal well being and specific needs.  Learning how to do that will require some experience on her part.  Hopefully, we'll make it through the treat-filled holidays this year with our sanity intact--and our blood sugar stable.

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ericksonfam 5 pts

also the dyes are horrible. Red 40 and Yellow 5 and 6 are the bad ones. These dyes are banned in other countries. The dyes can cause already hyperactive children to become even more so. My daughter is living proof! We also get night terrors and leg cramps from these ingredients which are in more than just candy. Something to consider is avoiding the dyes.

RawOn10 5 pts

patty,

if hypoglycemia were the problem, then kids would get wacked out after eating bananas or watermelon or other high glycemic carbs ... and they don't ... also, as you know (or should know), hypoglycemia isn't some vague, ethereal condition that mysteriously happens after one kind of high glycemic carb and not another ... it's a very specific and measurable condition ... also, "flipping out and running around like a goofball" are NOT symptoms of hypoglycemia, and are not part of the "whipple's triad" to determine if symptoms are caused by genuine hypoglycemia 

intolerance to corn syrup/high fructose corn syrup is a very real and (can be a) very disruptive condition ...

RawOn10 5 pts

if you look at the ingredient list for any candy you'll see that there's very little sugar there ... what IS there is corn syrup and other corn products ... high fructose corn syrup, corn syrup, dextrose, maltodextrine, et al ...

this is nearly always what causes a "devilish" reaction in kids (with high fructose corn syrup causing the worst reaction) ... not sugar ...

it's a genuine food intolerance and far more serious than just "my kid gets hyper on sweets" ... it's causing a reaction in the brain severe enough to alter behavior ... it's not quite as deadly as a peanut allergy, but it IS harmful and probably should be treated almost as seriously as a peanut allergy ... because we really don't know just what this stuff is doing to our kids ... or, more accurately, what it's doing to their brains and nervous systems ... a behavioral reaction means it's doing something ...

this is a good resource for info ... http://babyandkidallergies.com/high_fructose_corn_... ... but just  google "high fructose corn syrup" and "kids" ...

good luck ... one of my kids and one of my grandkids (and me, too!) are all intolerant to corn syrup ... it makes a HUGE difference when we keep those things out of our diet ...

Jac3286 5 pts

I'm not sure if it would work, or if it's even feasible, but maybe you could try sugar free candy? I know there are sugar free hard candies, and I'm sure I've seen sugar free gummies. It might be too late for Halloween, but maybe for next year, you can look online and see if you can find some sugar free chocolate bars. You can ask the teacher to give them to your kids in place of the sugary chocolate and give them to your kids yourself on Halloween and at parties. That way your child doesn't feel left out, but you don't have to deal with a hyperactive kid.

pattypless 5 pts

You have all made the right observations. There are some kids who can tolerate a certain amount of sugar, while others go wild after one candy. The explanation lies in their sugar sensitivity and their body's ability to maintain a stable blood sugar. Children (and adults) with strong mood and behavior changes after sugar, as well as strong sugar cravings often have Hypoglycemia. This means that their blood sugar drops dramatically after ingesting fast acting carbohydrates like plain sugar or easily digested carbs like white bread, noodles, cake, cookies etc. Often, these people can describe that they feel jittery, nervous, angry, light-headed about two to three hours after eating something sugary. They get tremendous cravings for sweets in order to get their blood sugar up again. The way to help these children and adults (as some of you found out already) is to stabilize the blood sugar with foods that take longer to digest and don't have such a big impact on the blood sugar level. Those foods include foods rich in protein and fiber. So, yes, a string cheese works! Make sure that every time your sugar-sensitive child eats something sweet to also serve protein-rich foods. Another trick to maintain a stable blood sugar is to eat frequent small meals, about every 3 hours.

There are some great books out about sugar sensitivity:

Sugar Shock! by Connie Bennett

Little Sugar Addicts by Kathleen Desmaisons

Bad Attitude by Audrey Ricker

In our sugar-sensitive household with four children we have a candy collection bag. Every candy the kids get at parties or restaurants goes in the bag. Once we have 100 candies, the kids have earned a special outing. They can't wait to get Halloween candy - to fill the bag! (The full bag will get magically emptied after the outing...)

Patty Pless MD, PCI Certified Parent Coach®, www.familyequilibrium.com ( http://www.familyequilibrium.com )

Expat Mum 7 pts

I was just thinking that maybe it's because it's such a large amount that some children react this way. What would happen if they were introduced to sugar in small amounts? Not that I'm advocating a new sugar diet (the dental bills for one thing make me run in the other direction) but perhaps the children can build up an immunity of sorts?

xblake 5 pts

Hah, I was just about to suggest the pre-fill on cheese. Works somewhat for our kids.  Our son has similar reactions, though probably not quite as extreme as you describe for your daughter. We are nearly a completely HFCS and sugar-free family (e.g. water instead of juice is the norm). I wonder if they simply react this way because their bodies haven't been inundated with a daily supply, and the shock of so much sugar at once just drives them haywire? I know that I have trouble eating a snickers bar as an adult without feeling my heart rate and skin temp rise.

Shannon LC Cate 13 pts

My two kids are different in their responses.  So I don't think it's simply that they aren't used to it.

JennaHatfield 59 pts

I'm kind of strict about sweets. Not overly strict because I know that only creates want. We just simply don't have sweets in the house. They're a rare treat. My oldest didn't have candy until just before his second birthday and his little brother beat him by a month or two on that one (it's harder with the younger one!). While my younger son doesn't get hyper with candy, my older son does. As such, when we were invited to TWO Halloween parties this year, neither that I wish to miss because of various circumstances, I've just decided that we'll go ahead and buckle down for a weekend of noise and chaos.

Thankfully, they forget about candy (Easter, Christmas, Halloween) about a day or two after it all passes. And as I don't eat chocolate myself, it doesn't expand my waistline either!

@FireMom ( http://twitter.com ) from Stop, Drop and Blog ( http://stopdropandblog.com ) and The Chronicles of Munchkin Land ( http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com )