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I have a confession. I like ham, but my ham creativity ended in the year 1997. In the March issue of the Martha Stewart magazine that year, there was this recipe for a beautiful ham: Ham 101.
It so happened that year, the week of Easter, I saw an ad for a "fill your freezer for dirt cheap" sort of deal at a small butcher in town. I went--intending only to get that deal. I ended up getting that deal and a whole ham. I came home, saw the recipe and thought it's a SIGN! If only I had taken it as a warning--my fear of all things related to ham may still be a dream.
At that point--we were a two adult, two very small children family. No way could we consume a whole ham. We invited another couple over, one was a vegetarian. I freaked out in my own June Cleaver way and decided in addition to this ham, I had to make some really impressive dishes. (With a 3-year-old and 1-year-old, on EASTER) I also wanted to make this ham way different than the ones I grew up with--grind my own spices? Glaze? Cool! I bought all the ingredients that we could ill afford at that point.
Picture this Easter day: I made Eggs Benedict. The kids did their egg hunt in a typical baby sort of cute way. They were dressed in adorable Easter outfits to attend church. We came home and I kicked into gear.
I made adorable matchstick carrot bundles. I did something with asparagus. I made angel biscuits. I fretted over the vegetarian starving, eating just my "side dishes." Little did I know that in less than 5 years I would also become a vegetarian, at least most of the time, for almost a decade. I rode herd on the two children.
I made a huge mess putting together this ham. I scored fat. I toasted and ground spices. I blew the door off the oven. Wait...what?
As I worked on the deviled eggs and carrot matchsticks sitting at the kitchen table, I gave my sister a call on the phone. Chatting and working away, I glanced over and noticed a fire in the oven. The alcohol in the glaze had caused a fire. OK, so, cutting off oxygen will cause the fire to go out, I thought. I figured it to be like a toaster oven fire--ignore it and it will go away. I flipped off the oven so the fire would go out.
I turned back to deviling eggs and talking to my sister on the phone. Then the door blew off the oven. Instead of the fire burning itself out--the oven door decided to blow off in retaliation. BAM. Really loud. Having your oven explode four feet from you ranks as a startling experience. I screamed for my husband. He had come running at the noise, anyway. We put the door back on. I finished cooking the ham, even more shaken.
I did go to my favorite chat room at the time to talk about it and I posted about it on my "home" message board.
The guests arrived. The meal was enjoyed by all and the ham WAS especially good--even the vegetarian had some. I wrote Martha, but she hasn't gotten back to me yet, more than a decade later. I guess she's been busy.
I have never tried making a "fancy ham" again. I heat them. I may stick some cloves in them or dump an alcohol free glaze on them. No more spice grinding or fat scoring for me. I keep it simple.
Now, I get to have fun making retro foods. No more pretty pictures luring me into fancy ingredients...and my oven door stays on!
This retro appetizer from the 1959 Better Homes and Gardens Holiday cookbook is a wonderful '50s creation for when a cheese ball just isn’t enough. I must warn you this is one of those creepy looking (to some) appetizers with a cream cheese “frosting” on the outside of the ham ball.
Interestingly, deviled ham is one of the tastes of spring for me. My mother often made egg salad with it for Easter lunch or the day after Easter. Give this one a try for your Easter brunch or party. You could even use it for a Mother's Day Brunch. Best of all? Your oven door won't blow off!
