Happy New Year!
The thing that I've most been dreading is done. I HAVE PICKED A DONOR. I opted for the only not-for-profit bank in the country. I know of several people that have had wonderful experiences with this bank.
They have one of the SMALLEST family limits that I could find -- at 10 families. There can be more than 10 children, but not more than 10 families with children from the same donor. If you've been reading along, you know that I've been totally freaked out by the possibility of tons and tons and tons of half sibs out there. So, this seemed like a good compromise.
I know that they handled an issue with a donor with a potential problem with a very high level of ethics and caring. So, the post conception support that they tout is actually true!
They have a high number of Identity Release donors available. Unfortunately, I didn't fall in love with an ID release donor. In fact, of the 3 of 63 donors that I whittled it down to, they all ended up being anonymous donors. There seems that there may be some flexibility with the donor I chose and he may change his mind in the future.
I do plan to join the bank's family message board so that we can keep in touch with half siblings. Currently, this donor has had no pregnancies yet, since he is fairly new. So, we may be hanging out there waiting for half siblings for awhile.
I'm a bit disappointed about not having a known donor, but logistically speaking it just seemed like an awful lot to navigate. In this state, there are no guarantees that a donor contract would protect us from having a donor possibly seek custody, because you cannot sever paternal rights until there is a child born.
I'm not ruling it out for the future, but for right now, this feels easier and manageable.
So, for $1,655.00 (including the 200.00 shipping fee), I am now the proud owner of 3 vials of highly potent, magical swimmers.
Oh! I forgot to say that this bank also will tell you the post thaw counts for each donor BEFORE YOU BUY. They also automatically release the vials with the highest counts FIRST. So, my donor's post thaw count is 65mil motile sperm. This is MUCH higher than the last donor I used. One of his samples was 10 mil motile (Fairfax cryo), which is pretty much the lowest cut off when using frozen samples. The bank I chose this time around requires at least 20 mil motile post thaw.
I have enjoyed the last few months off and being free from the crazy that is attempted baby making. However, I am refreshed, and once again a bit terrified, to be starting again.
I think the money part of this is the most difficult part for me. Every time it doesn't work, I just count up all of the money that I've wasted. And the first 3 cycles, I had free sperm! However, when money is already tight, add this into the mix and it's just, phew!
I'm looking into some options. I have many midwife friends that can likely do my IUI this time around, for way less money (possibly free). So, I'm having the samples shipped to my doctor's cryobank, but then I'm going to pull a little switcheroo on them and only do the monitoring there. I think. The monitoring is certainly the most lucrative part for them anyway.
See, every time you have a shipment of samples sent, it's 200.00, whether it's one vial or 10. So, I am having all of it shipped at once. My doctor's office doesn't even charge for storage, they do it as a courtesy. However, the office charges 176.00 for the IUI procedure, which takes under 30 minutes. HIGHWAY ROBBERY! The catheter system is 30.00 AT COST. Ridiculous.
I think that for this cycle I will likely have the IUI at the office because I need to make an appointment with the office that my friend works at. She's a midwife in training, so she needs her preceptor there, and they are only both in the office on Wednesdays. Today is already Wednesday... and I'm probably going to be IUI'ing on Monday...
Also, if I have the IUI on Monday, and I get pregnant this time... my due date will be 11-12-13. Which, by the way, makes me ridiculously happy. I love funky dates like that. :)
66.67 (1/3 shipping fee for vial)
485.00 (1 vial, .5cc, washed, IUI ready)
176.00 (IUI office visit)
119.00 (Clomid 50mg, 1 ovidrel trigger)
846.67 PER TRY !!!!
This does not include whatever the cost will be for the sperm prep/thaw. Last time, it cost 330.00 for sperm prep, but I have no idea what sort of samples they were processing. This time, they shouldn't need to do anything, but thaw.
Can someone please throw me a conception costs shower? Whatever I don't need, I'll put toward the home birth fund...