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Married people like sleeping in separate beds (gasp!): We were married for three years before discovering the luxury of alternate arrangements. But that’s not the disturbing part. I mean, hey, Who Am I to complain when being offered a king size mattress all to myself? That would just be rude. Plus, I feel like a queen between the sheets when given the option to sprawl.
It’s funny the way our sleep patterns have evolved. The first year of marriage was all about spooning. By the second year, we were content if our toes touched. Third? Butt to butt. And now that we’re in our fourth year of wedded how-did-I-ever-live-without-you bliss, we toss and turn, toss and turn, toss and turn, until John finally hoofs it to the spare bedroom.
One thing is for certain: we’ve gotten our money’s worth from the ‘ol faithful futon. But sometimes I don’t even hear John roll out of bed AND THAT is the disturbing part, if you ask me. I mean somebody could sneak into our house in the middle of the night and I would sleep right through the invasion. So would Oscar. Our pampered pooch could potentially sleep 23 hours a day. Yet another reason he seems to be part cat.
Truth is, our dog’s sleeping preferences take precedence in bed. (Marriage Counselors, Concerned Veterinarians and Sleep Lab Specialists can contact us at: StuffMarriedPeopleLike@hotmail.com) Oscar dozes while we read. And then we don’t have the heart to move him. So John and I flank the mattress, enjoying a quarter of the allotted space while our 12-pound Scoodle stretches horizontally between us. Reason #34 Why It’s A Dog’s Life: Sharing (or taking over) the bed.
If dogs really do inherit the personality of their owners, it should be blatantly obvious that sleep is highly valued here in MogLand. Oscar knows not to wake us in the morning. In fact, he will hold it and snooze until we’re good and begrudgingly ready to get out of bed. We even turn off our ringers on the weekends; just to prevent the possibility of being prematurely awakened by a telemarketer—or worse, my brother. But it’s the falling asleep part that’s giving us trouble. We simply have a lot on our minds lately: work, bills, birthday presents, the official start of football season occupying too many of our favorite channels. It’s a stressful time of year.
Reading used to provide that perfect escape for us, our worries drifted away while our eyelids became heavy with exhaustion. Yet nowadays catching Z’s isn’t so easy—and I should mention—we’re reading more than ever. On most nights, I am ready to turn off the bedside lamp before John is finished. That’s how the “spylight” came into play.
In a last-ditch effort to stay in our room, John whips out this tiny, battery-powered GE book light with the hope of reading a little longer and willing himself to fall asleep. Here’s the bottom line: when I see my hubby basked in the glow of the flip-top reading gadget, I know chances are good I’ll be waking up solo. But then I look on the bright side, at least Oscar still likes to spoon.
