Have you ever had to discipline someone elses child?

Do you have a nightmare neighbour?  A child you don't like yours playing with?  Have you ever said no to a playdate?


We have a nightmare neighbour.  We only met these neighbour about 6 months into living in our new home.  The children met first.  The little boy knocked on our door and asked if a little boy lived here as he'd seen my boys toys laying around the yard.  Yes, I replied.  He seemed so sweet at the beginning!


So ever since that first visit, the boys got along like a house on fire.  I commented to his mum how much alike they were, typical boys boys, loving the outdoors and exploring. 


The summer ended and they must have had around 4 playdates so far until the winter arrived and the schools were back.  My boy is still only at preschool 2 days a week so we'd be home by 3pm the latest each day.  The little visits started off as twice a week and in he would come and be nice as pie, off they would run to the toy room and play happily.  This would last around 5 minutes until my boy would come running to me.  Now my boy is no pushover and doesn't usually come running to mum, so it was a little concerning.  I would investigate and his little friend wouldn't speak and would just run away!  I would text his mum to tell her what had occurred but she would be oblivious of even him visiting!  She still thought he was under her roof!


So what started as a twice a week, sort of play date, turned into an everyday occasion.  He would knock on the door until he was seen and was let in.  He was a little sneaky and would be very hurtful towards my boy if things didn't go his way.  I was more put off that his older brother, only 13 year old himself would collect him after an hours play.  Wheres your mum?  Oh, she's still at work.  So this 13 year old was in charge.  God bless him, he would try and drag his 5 year old brother, literally, out of my house kicking and screaming!


This continued for weeks and was stressing me out, I would dread a knock on the door.  What followed was arguments and fights with my boy, flushed batmans down the toilet, throwing toys at my 12 month old, hitting my boy with anything he could get his hands on.  I found myself to start making excuses when he did knock at the door, sorry no we're going out, sorry dinner is ready, along those lines.  He was very persistent and it took a good few weeks for the knocks to stop.  They have now come to halt, thank goodness!


The conversations I used to have with his mum, on the handful of occassions she would actually come and collect him, were quite disturbing too.  She had in the past actually given him tablets to send him asleep because she couldn't handle his behaviour.  He would spit at her, kick her, scream etc etc.  This is what we witnessed at almost every visit.


I don't want either of my children to see this sort of behaviour and think that its normal in any way, shape or form.  So, on our approach to the Australian summer I am quite on the lookout for such visits to reoccur and will be just saying no!  I need to find my harsh voice!  I know I have one!


Have you had a similar experience?  If so, how did you deal with it?