Not sure if anyone has done a statistical study on this particular issue, but in business folklore there
is the common belief that many a career has been torpedoed at the annual holiday office party.

If not torpedoed, certainly embarrassed.

When it comes to office party etiquette it seems that many of us are like the toddler who has to learn from experience not to touch the stove because it's hot---you can tell us a million times but until we get burned we can't seem to help ourselves.

Or maybe we simply don't care if we do get burned. Perhaps its just the fun of seeing coworkers ,managers and bosses let their hair loose. Perhaps seeing this other side of co-workers makes it easier in day-to -day negotiations to have that picture of that person doing that thing at the office party.

For what its worth when I went surfing to see what others had to say about office party etiquette it does seem that the women bloggers are more concerned about this issue than their male counterparts. It's actually hard to find a business etiquette piece written by a guy. Does that mean that guys don't believe that their behavior at said party could actually change the direction of their career? Or do men just think the only thing they have to keep in mind etiquette wise is to stay sober?

There are two genres of holiday office etiquette. There's the real advice from business etiquette experts and there are the cautionary tales from those who have been there and done that.

If you are seriously looking for advice on this topic there are lots of people sharing their opinions. Just type in Office Party Etiquette and Google will provide you with lots of people who have something to say about what you should and shouldn't do at your office holiday party. Lydia Ramsey of The Sideroad has answers to questions like, "Do I Have To Go?" and "How Long Do I Have to Stay?"

Personally, my preferences go to the genre of the office party cautionary tale.

From Kathy Zappa, Blog Navigator for The Power Up! Blog

Oh the stories I could tell! One of my favorite stories happened just last year when I was employed at a very large company. At the party, there were numerous photo booths placed around the ballroom. You know, the cheesy ones you see in the malls where you cram in and try to smile normally as an incredibly bright flash renders you squinty eyed and dazed after the first shot. Employees lined up at the booths all night and as the night wore on and more drinks were consumed the pictures got a lot more interesting. Little did anyone know, all the pictures were recorded and posted to the company website Monday morning before anyone could screen them. As word got out, phone calls, emails and texts were flying back and forth between departments and screams, gasps, “Isn’t she married?” “Nice tattoo.” “I didn’t know they were dating!” “Are those real?” and “I’m so fired,” were heard numerous times before the site was finally shut down a little over an hour later. By then, the damage was done.

While many companies hold their parties off premise, there are some that still have their annual party festiviities in office. For that Miss Mentor has some advice on what you CAN do with a copy machine.

1. BEFORE the bottle is open, you can copy a picture of your smiling FACE next to the bottle. When the original comes out decide if you will use it as the interoffice invite (deliver by hand for extra style points), your holiday card (shrink to postcard size and copy onto card stock), or simply as fine art for your cubicle (please remove after 2 weeks).

2.AFTER the bottle is open, don’t even think about going near the copier. Don’t do it. You’ll look like a Scottish fella in a field full of sheep. You’ll be busted by the office prude so fast your head will spin . . . more. Remember, YouTube is everywhere. It’s worse than Big Brother.

In 2005 SharpWoman Granberry Nunnally did provide some advice to men on achieving a "Highly Successful Office Holiday Part Interaction." It deals with advice on selecting the perfect date.

Conservative vs. Flashy: If you work in a pretty traditional workplace — (coats and ties, significant number of older folks, religious folks) — and, you often date women who are more flashy than your coworkers… you may want to ask someone else.

Education Level: If your colleagues are all highly educated and your preferred date is noticeably not, the invitation may be both an embarrassment to her and to your employer and colleagues. While you may find her delightful and she may even be totally brilliant, if you have not seen her outgun PhDs or whatever level is required in your workplace, you may be in for a rude awakening.

Dating several women, but neither stands out: ask out the most independent one to the party if you think you’ll have a good time with her and she can deal with the fact that she doesn’t know anyone. If she does know some office friends, she’s your choice.

If you are that date, Hillary Rhodes of the Associated Press has some suggestions of what you should or shouldn't do.

• Know Your place
• Watch the booze
• Plan ahead
• Deal with shoptalk
• Be a good sport

My fondness of the holiday party cautionary tale genre is very personal. I, like so many of the working wounded have my own cautionary tale. One I may have shared in the past.



Once upon a time, long long ago, in a land far far away, two young female reporters would get together for a weekly home-cooked meal. One night, as they dined on Chun King Chicken Chow Mein over Minute Rice and a bottle of Nouveau Beaujolais, the silly young girls decided it would be fun to rank their male co-workers. And so, long before David Letterman had a Top 10 list, these two ingénues created their own top 10 – listing which male co-workers they thought would be good in bed.

While the two girls didn’t agree on everyone on the list, they were unanimous on their number one choice. They chose their boss –the news director.

Several months passed. The two girls never breathed a word of the list. But then, on the night of the holiday party, one of the girls, who had one too many rum-and-cokes, decided it was time to go public with the list.

And so it came to pass that one of the young reporters could never quite get excited about going to a holiday office party ever again.

The moral of the story: Don't share secrets with girls who like rum-and-coke, and whatever you do,leave the Top 10 List to David Letterman.

Have a tale you care to share? Advice on what to wear, say or do?

Image credit: LastKiss Comics.com

Elana blogs about business culture at FunnyBusiness

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