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I'm here to warn you against the dangers of holiday makeup palettes.
Yes, they're alluring, yes, they're fun, yes, they're heavily promoted, and yes, they're available at every price point, from Walgreen's to Ulta to Neiman Marcus.
But I--a veteran of the 1990s Urban Decay Glitter Wars, as well as several Bobbi Brown and Estee Lauder skirmishes--am here to tell you that in the wrong hands, they can be very, very dangerous.
Here's why:
1. It's all just too much. Take the Ulta Gift of Color Blockbuster, currently on sale for $18.74.
This means for less than $20 you can bring home 56 eyeshadows, 15
lipsticks, and four blushes.
But what are the odds that they'll all
look good on you? Or that you'll know how to combine them? Or that your
bathroom will be big enough to store them?
Very slim indeed.
My advice? If you must, buy one and give it to your teenaged babysitter or niece or other young person who has moved, emotionally, only one step past Crayola 128 crayon collections. But keep it out of your house. This palette is a loaded gun, my friends.
2. Limited Edition makeup? Is stupid.
If you spend any time at Sephora, Ulta, or high-end department stores, you'll discover that December is a huge month for Limited Edition makeup collections. They are legion. You must resist them.
Even companies that made their name by selling basic, wearable colors--like Bobbi Brown and Laura Mercier--go a little crazy for the holidays.
For example, this year Saks is selling Bobbi Brown's Lip and Eye Palette. 
This baby presses all of my 1990s glitter buttons: metalic! sequin! exclusive! limited edition! I'm a recovering glitterholic, and I need to call my sponsor!
But mark my words, if you pop for one of these, you'll regret it. This is $60 worth of sparkling eyeshadow that will be cascading down your cheeks before you've sipped your second cocktail. Just say no.
Even worse is Laura Mercier's black and white eyeshadow quad, currently available at Neiman Marcus for $38.
What can I say? It's just so black and white--with, OK, some glitter. Perfect if you want to go out as Kung Fu Panda II: The Disco Years.
3. It's a shimmery, glittery, colorful apple--but don't bite it.
Here's another problem with palettes. They must look festive and tempting in the store. And what's more festive and tempting than lots of sparkle? Like, say, this LORAC full face collection?
But when you decide to use a product--say, the blush--from your big blockbuster palette, the temptation is enormous to use more. So you do. To your shimmering blusher you add three shades of sparkling eyeshadow, a sweep of glittering highlighter, and a slick of pearlescent lipgloss.
Congratulations. You now look like what would happen if a Christmas tree married a holiday sweater.
4. But it's the holidays!
OK. I'll stop being the Grinch of makeup palettes.
If you must, I recommend the Nordstrom Holiday 2008 palette.
This may seem like hypocrisy, since with 64 eyeshadows, 16 lip colors, and four face colors, it has an insane variety of colors to play with. And you could end up looking like a Howard Johnson's restaurant, what with your aqua eyelids and coral lips.
But at $24.95, it's cost-per-color the least expensive option out there.
And the whole thing is only 6 inches square, which means that you'll be able to fit both you and the palette in your bathroom while you apply eight shades of eyeshadow to make rainbow eyelids.
So have fun, Cindy Lou Who. Just don't say I didn't warn you.
