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Holiday makeup palettes, or, how not to look like a snow-globe

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I'm here to warn you against the dangers of holiday makeup palettes.

Yes, they're alluring, yes, they're fun, yes, they're heavily promoted, and yes, they're available at every price point, from Walgreen's to Ulta to Neiman Marcus.

But I--a veteran of the 1990s Urban Decay Glitter Wars, as well as several Bobbi Brown and Estee Lauder skirmishes--am here to tell you that in the wrong hands, they can be very, very dangerous.

Here's why:

1. It's all just too much. Take the Ulta Gift of Color Blockbuster, currently on sale for $18.74. 

Ulta palette

This means for less than $20 you can bring home 56 eyeshadows, 15
lipsticks, and four blushes.

But what are the odds that they'll all
look good on you? Or that you'll know how to combine them? Or that your
bathroom will be big enough to store them?

Very slim indeed.

My advice? If you must, buy one and give it to your teenaged babysitter or niece or other young person who has moved, emotionally, only one step past Crayola 128 crayon collections. But keep it out of your house. This palette is a loaded gun, my friends.

2. Limited Edition makeup? Is stupid.

If you spend any time at Sephora, Ulta, or high-end department stores, you'll discover that December is a huge month for Limited Edition makeup collections. They are legion. You must resist them.

Even companies that made their name by selling basic, wearable colors--like Bobbi Brown and Laura Mercier--go a little crazy for the holidays.

For example, this year Saks is selling Bobbi Brown's Lip and Eye Palette. Bobbi Brown palette

This baby presses all of my 1990s glitter buttons: metalic! sequin! exclusive! limited edition! I'm a recovering glitterholic, and I need to call my sponsor!

But mark my words, if you pop for one of these, you'll regret it. This is $60 worth of sparkling eyeshadow that will be cascading down your cheeks before you've sipped your second cocktail. Just say no.

Even worse is Laura Mercier's black and white eyeshadow quad, currently available at Neiman Marcus for $38. 

Laura Mercier Eyeshadow Quad

What can I say? It's just so black and white--with, OK, some glitter. Perfect if you want to go out as Kung Fu Panda II: The Disco Years.

3. It's a shimmery, glittery, colorful apple--but don't bite it.

Here's another problem with palettes. They must look festive and tempting in the store. And what's more festive and tempting than lots of sparkle? Like, say, this LORAC full face collection?

LORAC holiday collection

But when you decide to use a product--say, the blush--from your big blockbuster palette, the temptation is enormous to use more. So you do. To your shimmering blusher you add three shades of sparkling eyeshadow, a sweep of glittering highlighter, and a slick of pearlescent lipgloss. 

Congratulations. You now look like what would happen if a Christmas tree married a holiday sweater.

4. But it's the holidays!

OK. I'll stop being the Grinch of makeup palettes.

If you must, I recommend the Nordstrom Holiday 2008 palette.

Nordstrom's Holiday palette

This may seem like hypocrisy, since with 64 eyeshadows, 16 lip colors, and four face colors, it has an insane variety of colors to play with. And you could end up looking like a Howard Johnson's restaurant, what with your aqua eyelids and coral lips.

But at $24.95, it's cost-per-color the least expensive option out there.

And the whole thing is only 6 inches square, which means that you'll be able to fit both you and the palette in your bathroom while you apply eight shades of eyeshadow to make rainbow eyelids.

So have fun, Cindy Lou Who. Just don't say I didn't warn you.

 

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lleopold 5 pts

 It's actually pretty wonderful! Now, used sparingly - the metallic shadows are quite pretty and really not over the top.

This was really hilarious and made me take a step back from the Lorac Croc palette. I did, however, pick up the Tarte Vanity. 

Who am I kidding - I better carry your advice in my purse through the remainder of the holiday season! 

- Laurie
www.newlyweddedwife.com ( http://www.newlyweddedwife.com/ )

jspahitz 5 pts

I found two makeup products I really love for the holidays.  It's from a new brand called Vis-a-Vis Cosmetics (www.visaviscosmetics.com) and they have these lipglazes that are beautiful for the holidays.  I love the Minx lipglaze that can go over my favorite lip color!  They also have the Diva Dust Luminous Blush that also works well as an eyeshadow.  These two products give me the right amount of shimmer for the holidays!  Love it!!

Sarah O. 5 pts

Kung Fu Panda II: The Disco Years.  HA ha ha ha!

- LemonySarah 

mwittle 5 pts

www.mwittle.wordpress.com ( http://www.mwittle.wordpress.com/ )

I agree that sometimes these wonderfuly packaged beauties distract us from what they are really selling us.

Just the other day I was in Sephora and Stila had this woner exclusive lip gloss package. I wanted it...badly. It had like 5 different lip glosses inside of it and they were baby sizes. They were so cute and I had it in my hand. Then I stopped and thought about how much lip gloss I have at home already (about 20). How many of those lip glosses do I use (about 2).

I was proud of myself for talking myself out of buying another cutely packaged lip gloss.

Just a few weeks ago I purchased a lip gloss package from Philosophy. I can't stand the ginger bread kind. I can't find the orange cranberry one. For some reason I am compelled to hold on to the spiced pear one. I went into Sephora for the smores one and came out with those three.

I am so pitiful:(

Super Jive 5 pts

Nice post, I roffled. This is giving me flashbacks of middle school and trying to make myself up like Gem in the privacy of my bathroom with 60 shades of eyeshadow!

SJ

Blogher Pop Culture Editor ( http://www.blogher.com/blog/super-jive ) | I, Asshole ( http://iasshole.org )

RenaissanceTrophyWife 5 pts

Love the reviews!

Speaking of the lovechild of a holiday sweater and a Christmas tree, Sephora lets you preview tsome interesting color combos on yourself:

http://mistletoemakeover.com/ 

Renaissance Trophy Wife: the modern girl's guide to smart lifestyle investments

http://renaissancetrophywife.wordpress.com

blackbird17 5 pts

If EVER I considered eye shadow and blush and concealer, YOU would be my source for info. Well done, as usual.