Hollywood, High Heels, and My Big Pregnant Belly: VH1's Critics' Choice Awards

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The 17th Annual Critics' Choice Movie Awards aired live last night on VH1... Viola Davis, George Clooney and a little, silent-but-amazing-must-see film called The Artist took the top prizes. Spielberg, Pitt and DiCaprio showed up. Scorsese and Sean Penn were honored. Bob Dylan even performed. (Check out a complete list of winners here.)

Knowing that big things were going to go down (since the Broadcast Film Critics Association is the largest film critics association in the U.S. and Canada), I took my duties as a member very seriously: I used every excuse to glam up my 8-month baby bump, practically jumped into my sparkly heels and trucked it down to Hollywood with my hubby to pretend that I was a celebrity for the night.

Jill Simonian attending the 17th Critics' Choice Movie Awards

Critic Jill Simonian at the VH1 Critics' Choice Awards

With no booze in my system, too much dessert, a dangerously-packed ballroom of actors/critics/publicists, plus a near bump-in during cocktail hour with stunning starlet Diane Kruger (thanks to my own protruding baby belly), the evening added up to be an interesting mix of tastelessness and class...from my perspective anyways. Here's what stood out to me:

Director/producer and comedy guru Judd Apatow dropped not one, but TWO F-bombs in his acceptance speech for Best Comedy (for Bridesmaids) on behalf of women everywhere. Even though I think the guy's brilliant, I call tastelessness! After a wandering commentary, Apatow concluded with "Jerry Lewis once said he didn't think women were funny, so I'd just like to say, with all respect: F*ck you." 

I appreciate the sentiment and am elated that Bridesmaids got such fantastic recognition from us critics, but - call me an overly-sensitive pregnant prude - I sort of wish that Judd had kept his vocab in-check. I still think that Judd is *brilliant*, but did ya have to go there, man? Even though it was crass, Bridesmaids was one of those monumental comedies this past year that surprised audiences with an incomparable, stellar all-female cast... if only Judd kept it semi-classy for the ladies in the room. We do want more movies made by women - for women - in Hollywood. He seemed so angry to me. Watch the video:

 
On the other end of the spectrum, Viola Davis was a class act. Taking home the Best Actress award for her portrayal of a mistreated Southern housemaid in The Help, the woman made me cry during her tender acceptance speech about the two most important days in someone's life (shoulda seen that one coming, considering how her performances always make me weep). Talk about knowing and showing how to do a speech right. I personally think her next gig will be with Steven Spielberg judging by his expression as he watched her onstage. Hell, she could win the Oscar this year based on that speech alone. And her knockout red dress didn't hurt her either. Grab a tissue and take a peek:
 
 
Since when did I turn into a speech connoisseur? I blame my baby belly. Truth is, being pregnant at the awards this year made it a whole different experience. No wine, champagne or any other type of liquor to haze my judgement. It was still Hollywood, it was still fun, but without a doubt I was walking around with more hormones than any publicist in their right mind would probably ever allow in a confined space. With that, it was time to take my bump home.
 
Did you watch the Critics' Choice Movie Awards? What did you think?
 
[...If you want to see the little after-party that happened at my house when I did get home, visit me at TheFabMom.com.]

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