The house guest

So I knew it would happen. It was inevitable. It is one of the rights of passage of a divorce that goes right along with moving out, signing icky legal documents, sleeping in your bed alone etc….

The first spider.

And it’s a doozy.

Drying my hair this morning, I look up and see a spider so large I think it has its own shadow. And it’s high up toward the ceiling. Great. Maybe it will just wander it’s way out the window.

But if not, it could get in my bed….

So this is bad, I think. I’m just going to go to work now… (First stage of grief is denial.)

At lunch, I returned home and it was still there. Larger than life. Mocking me.

I consulted with my mom.

Mom: Well, you just have to kill it. I had to kill some big spiders in England.
Me: Maybe I could call hot neighbor and have him kill it.
Mom: No. That is pathetic. Don’t go to that level.
Me: It’s not even like that. It is just about the spider.
Mom: Still pathetic.
Me: Fine.

Not the motherly advice I was seeking.

I went around and tried to get some advice from co-workers. One co-worker said, “suck it up.”

Well now that was harsh.

No, she meant literally, “suck it up” with the vacuum.

Hmmmm…something to consider.


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