Why does it hurt so badly to lose a Godparent?




Its mid-day time, nap time for some little ones that are too young for attending school or nap time for those whom are not little.  On my usual day, about this time, I am trying to catch my mother on the phone before her day nap. She and I speak at least twice a week, usually more or less depending on the extent in which our families are doing, updating on Birthday’s, events or just to plain out gossip. 

So being I knew that she had been to the specialist the previous day, I immediately ask her about her doctor’s visit. Upset about her own results, she begins to complain about being admitted to the hospital by her specialist. Detailing just of the torcher, and not began able to eat for weeks, followed by the strangest silence. My mother carried sadness to her voice as if she was unsure whether or not she wanted to mention what she really wanted to talk about or telling me the bad news just yet.

"Ok, she said your daddy left the house at four o clock this morning. About an hour later, was a doorbell ring following a frantic knock at the door.  I peeked out and it was your godfather aside your  god brother standing closely inside the screen of the front door."

"Well, what did they want? Tapping my feet fast on the green carpet, I can barely sit at the edge of my chair, I awaiting her answer.

‘’Well he told me she took her last breath this morning. She said they told him she had been calling him that day in the nursing home. ”   My mother paused for a few a seconds or more before she continued, explaining how they both  son and the father hadn’t been able to keep their composure as they spoke grasping the rails onside on the porch as they spoke.

Softly dapping tissue up under my eyes, I couldn't speak. So I took a moment for myself.  I had so many questions to ask and so many memoirs swimming around in my head about her and how I used to come to her house every day when I was a child, because she lived right down the street. . Thoughts and feelings flushed my face as I attempted to continue talking without my voice cracking.

Sounding steady with relief, my mother quickly changed the subject to my sibling brother. Even though it bothered me I just couldn't shake the fact that this tragedy had happened. This was new to me, not to many people I knew that close had passed before so that pain in my heart made me feel overwhelmed by the world, my children, and husband. I just couldn’t believe that this was someone that used to care for me and my other siblings while I was growing up. 


Poor Ole Mime