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Rejection is part of the fabric of life and there is no human on this Earth that is immune to it. I still remember a sleepover party that I was not invited to in fourth grade. My two best friends went and I stayed home and cried. While circumstances vary, the feelings surrounding rejection remain the same for all of us. Whether it be receiving a poor mark on a paper we worked on day-in and day-out or discovering our boyfriend ditched us for someone else, loneliness, sadness, and feelings of self-doubt stream into our soul. So, how should we deal with these unwelcome feelings?
I have always taught my children that life is about plan "B". We need to be prepared to shift our actions and behaviors to accomodate a second, but not inferior, plan of action. "What if we don't have a plan B?" they ask. "Well, you need to create one," I tell them. Our challenge in life is letting go of our plan "A".
Today, I had a book proposal rejected by a publishing company. Flat our rejected. I don't have a plan "B". In fact, I don't know if I really want a plan "B" because I really liked my plan "A". As I sat alone today, I doubted myself..."What if I'm just not good enough?" "What if this is a stupid idea?" "Why did I waste all of my time on this proposal anyway?" Then, suddenly, the words I spoke to my children shot into me like a bullet. I desparetly needed to start creating my plan "B". While It would have been smart to have a plan "B" from the get-go (like another publishing company maybe), it is never too late to dive right into another course of action. "It is not an inferior plan," I'm still whispering to myself. It's just another road I must travel to get to my destination....writing a book.
So, I guess I handle rejection with anger at first, followed by doubting myself, questioning my plan, and finally finding another way to reach my dreams. And yes, mixed up in all of that, I cry, just like I did back in the fourth grade when I was leftout of the party. As Tony Robbins says: When you succeed, you party. When you fail, you ponder and change." How do you handle rejection?
