How An Interview With My Husband Led To A Visit To The World's Largest Wind Chime (Score!)
It is a five hour non-stop drive between my house and St. Louis. Ha. A non-stop drive. Like that's ever gonna happen. Last week, my kids were in the backseat, metaphorically thumbing their noses at my good old fashioned family road trip by using any available electronic device they could find on our drive back home from our mini-vacation.
This left at least five hours with just my husband and myself. I pounced on the opportunity to pick his brain a little by interviewing him. The following is a small portion of my interview. I'd post the entire interview, but I come off looking really bad after a small ruckus broke out over someone repeatedly spitting his cherry pits out of the car window at eighty miles per hour, much to the annoyance of someone else in the car. I may or may not have gone a tad off my nut over the whole experience.
And, while we're on the subject, who picks half a pound of cherries off the backyard cherry tree minutes before embarking on a five hour non-stop road trip to St. Louis? I'll give you a hint: It was the same guy who forgot about the pits in the cherries and had little choice but to spit them out of the car window whilst zipping along at eighty mph on the highway.
Not that it bothered me or anything.
I will now present to you a small snippet of my interview with my beloved husband.
State your name and your occupation.
Okay. Fine. Engineer, did you say? Why do you like being an engineer?
What? Why? Are you really going to do this? Are you seriously interviewing me? Can't we just listen to the radio like normal people?
Sure, but only if it's Jen music. And by that I mean completely awesome tunes of my choosing.
Ew. No. I'll participate in your interview. I like being an engineer because it's logical (here he gives what can only be described as a pointed stare in my direction) and I get to use my mind to solve problems. And donuts. Don't forget there's usually lots of donuts around.
Is my taste in music really that bad?
So … want to have a good old fashioned family road trip the remaining four and a half hours home?
In a couple of years the girls can drive us on car trips. We can sit in the back and make out.
What's the best thing about being married to me?
Can you hear me?
I don't know … lots of cricket noises. Does this five hour trip make you want to rent an RV and drive across the country with me?
Do you like road trips with me?
What? Tolerable? Really? Okay. I can see that. I will accept tolerable. Ever had the desire to be a truck driver?
Yep. Roughly from ages seven to nine I desperately wanted to drive a big rig.
But you hate to drive.
Yeah. That's why I gave up the dream. I'm substantially better at being a passenger than a driver … want me to google quirky landmarks and/or roadside attractions along our route home?
Hey, if it's fun I'm up for it.
Really? Cool. I'll google it right now … dang it. No internet access. Wait. (Narrowing my eyes at him). You knew this was going to happen, didn't you?
So … what's on your mind?
Did you know that if your finger tip gets cut off right at the cuticle, your whole finger tip will grow back?
Yep. Nail, bone and all.
There's something about the cells in a human cuticle that have this ability.
That's amazing. You know the coolest factoids. How you don't have your own show on PBS is beyond me.
Are you writing this down?
It's good stuff. I like it. Regenerating fingers is good stuff.
It's weird that you would jot it down. Well, not really. You write down weird stuff.
Just so you know, I'm writing that comment down, too.
I think this interview is over.
Fine by me. Hey look! I have internet service … and guess what! We're about five miles away from the world's largest wind chime. Woo hoo! We are SO pulling over to see that.