How to Write a Blog Post in 15 EZ Steps

How to Write a Blog Post in 15 EZ Steps

A friend stopped by recently and announced she was thinking about starting a blog and she needed some advice. After I stopped snort-laughing about the fact that anyone would ask my advice about blogging, I agreed to offer up my posting process, with the caveat that everyone approaches posting differently.

But how do you get people to read your posts?” she asked. ”That is what you’ll spend most of your blog life trying to figure out,” I replied. ”If you come up the magic formula, you’ll make millions. Until then, you need something for them to read when they do find you.”

I explained that the mechanics of posting are fairly general, but the process is unique to each blogger. Many Laugh Lines posts came to be using the following method:

1. Sit bolt upright in bed at 2 a.m. with a fabulous, three-glasses-of-wine-before-bedtime induced idea for a hilarious post that had you laughing in your sleep, which you didn’t write down because you didn’t want to come out from under the warm, poufy duvet and you were sure you’d remember because it was just too good to forget.

2. Go back to sleep.

3. Wake up later and realize you have no freakin’ clue what shot you out of bed three hours earlier. NOOOOO!

4. Take a hot shower, during which you rummage through your entire repertoire of memory games to retrieve your original idea. Halfway through, little snatches begin to wander back. Not wanting to lose the Great Idea twice, you shout for Hubs to get to the bathroom now, with a tablet and a penas you scramble out of the shower, head full of suds, to start writing before your next bout of early onset dementia kicks in.

5. Throw on whatever you can grab as you run down the hall to get to your computer and start typing a rough draft that has you cracking up the entire time because you’re just so damn funny.

6. Finish the draft and go have breakfast, so you can come back to it with fresh eyes. Ernest Hemingway instructed his students to ”Write drunk, edit sober.” Not literally feasible at 5 in the morning, but grasps the essence of writing. Get it down on paper in any clumsy way you can, then edit the crap out of it.

7. Finish breakfast and head back to your office to begin the editing process.

8. Re-read the gem that was going to launch your new career as a full-time writer, and realize it’s not quite as good as you thought. Okay, it sucks. Take a deep breath as your mind whirs past a half-dozen alternate careers you can explore when you quit blogging, because the chances of ever getting paid for this blather are only slightly greater than winning the lottery twice in one day, finally deciding to just walk away for a few hours, giving yourself time to decide whether it’s worth editing or should be simply deleted so your suckiness is wiped from the universe, never to be shared in this lifetime.

9. Return two hours later, determined to bring the draft up to its original potential, and start editing, which basically involves redoing the entire post, copying, pasting, deleting, adding, and rearranging until you start laughing again, feeling that little flutter in your stomach that you get when you’re nailing it.

At this point, I felt the need to add a blogging truism. Guess what? We don’t know which posts are going to end up as #1 hits on our “Best of” menu. Regardless of what your blogging genre is, it’s a bit of a crapshoot. I’ve written posts where I’ve laughed the entire time I was writing, that were apparently only read by two family members and a gerbil, if his profile picture was accurate. And I’ve posted “filler” pieces that were entertaining, but not laugh-out-loud funny, that came in with some of my highest views ever. The moral? Write what you love. The rest is out of your control. Now back to the process.

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