The Hunger Games – or Why My Paycheck is Direct Deposit Straight to Costco

SEARCH AND DESTROY ALL THE FOOD STUFFS!

The muppets can Pack. It. Down. Here is a sampling of our weekend menu. (As a reminder, Logan weighs 28 pounds; Caden is 23.) I do not know where they are putting it.

Breakfast:

  • Glass of milk
  • Large handful of Cheerios
  • Jumbo banana
  • Single container of yogurt

Upon completion… “Mo? Mo? Mo? Beeeri. Mo beeriis pees.” (More berries please.) Spoken with increasing hysteria.

  • Handful of blueberries
  • Handful of blackberries

Morning Snack:

  • Cup of water
  • Handful of Kix
  • Cup of water
  • Glass of milk
  • ENTIRE 7-inch chocolate chip Belgian waffle
  • Cup of water

Upon completion… “Mo? Mo? Mo? Cacar? CACA! AHHHHHH MOHHHHH! CACA.” (I really need a cracker to wash down my waffle.) Spoken with increasing hysteria.

  • 2 grassini breadsticks
  • 4 Ritz crackers
  • Cup of water

Lunch:

  • Glass of milk
  • Slice of wheat bread
  • Stick of string cheese
  • Handful of blueberries
  • Handful of blackberries
  • Handful of cooked baby carrots
  • Half an avocado
  • Kiwi
  • 4 slices deli chicken

Pass out from exhaustion or get put in bed to rest despite protests due to obvious fatigue and irritability.

Afternoon Snack:

  • Cup of water
  • 2 handfuls of goldfish (“Feeesh? Feesh? Feeeeeeesh!”)
  • 4 Ritz crackers
  • Cup of water
  • 2 Ritz crackers

Upon completion… “Mo? Mo? Mo? Beeeri. Mo beeriis pees.” (More berries please.) Beware the rabid dogs near the berry bowl. You may lose a finger as they are inhaled.

  • Handful of blueberries
  • Cup of water
  • Goldfish crumbs/crushed Cheerios procured from beneath the rug.
  • Cup of water

Upon completion… “Mo? Mo? Mo? Cacar? CACA! AHHHHHH MOHHHHH! CACA.” (I really need a cracker to wash down my waffle.) Spoken with increasing hysteria.

  • 4 Ritz crackers
  • 2 grassini breadsticks
  • Cup of water

Dinner:

  • 4 Ritz crackers
  • Cup of water
  • Side ramekin of broccoli
  • Kid’s meal basket of fries
  • Turkey burger (the ENTIRE thing)
  • Slice of angel food cake
  • Cup of water

(Note: Attempt to consume Mommy’s cherry vodka limeade was thwarted.)

Each.

I’m going to blame a growth spurt on this unquenchable appetite. It has to be right? Right?

"It's double the giggles and double the grins, and double the trouble if you're blessed with twins." Follow our adventures at www.streamdoubletrouble.com

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