I am sick of talking about my weight.

But honestly, what is the alternative? Should I just keep spiraling
down until I have gained back every ounce of weight I lost and more?
This
morning as I drove to my weight watchers meeting I thought I would have
definitely lost some weight because well, get this logic, since I had
gained so much back since the end of January, I believed "I must have
lost something this week". When the nice weigh in woman told me I had
gained 1.6 pounds, I just thought to myself how ridiculous this is. I
am so not getting anywhere. Every week it's the same thing. My WW
leader calls this the weight loss cha-cha. Up 2 pounds, down 1 pound,
up .6, down .2, slowly but surely that has been me the last two months,
going nowhere but in the wrong direction.
Yesterday I thought about
quitting Weight Watchers. I fantasized that if I quit I could save the
money I was spending on it for the new clothes I could buy myself after
I finished losing my weight. Somehow I thought I'd magically lose
weight if I quit WW. Now that makes a lot of sense.
I also thought
about using my WW money to see a shrink instead. I thought maybe he
could tell me why I was failing to lose weight and maybe act as a
personal coach of sorts. That idea quickly dissolved when I realized I
so did not want to get into my whole life story. I am sick of analyzing
it.
Driving home I accepted the fact that I haven't focused on my
goal & I need to start anew. So today I am putting a weight loss
tracker at the top of my post. I am using this as a daily visual
reminder that I want to lose 17 pounds. & I don't want to take a
year and a half to do it. I need to recommit to my program. I also have
to acknowledge the good things I have been doing.
So that I will end this post on a positive note I am listing four things I have been successful at.

I exercise at least 4 times a week, sometimes 5

I have been getting enough sleep

I
didn't gain all the weight back that I had lost. I am still down 17
pounds from when I first started weight watchers a few years ago.

I didn't quit WW today.

When
I lose 17 more pounds, that will put me a few pounds ahead of my weight
watchers goal. I've always wanted to do that. Then I'll get to become a
lifetime member!
I just realized something. This goal should be at the very top of my bucket list. Hey, I'm already half way there!