I am your Redneck Queen!

     I spent my early morning hours in the forest following the tracks of my favorite herd of doe's Trixie, Bambi  and Candy.  The more I think about it, the more I think the doe's I'm constantly seeing near Green Valley Lake are the same ones. Maybe one of these days I will actually get a picture, before Garth Brooks country twang omitted from my smart phone scares them off.    Yes, it would appear these mountain deer are not a fan of old school country music.    Or maybe they are scared off by my constant coughing.    Yeah, that could be it.    At least I got out there this morning and I tried to run a bit. I made it about two and a half miles up Pup's Trail to the water tank up a hill so steep... I almost passed out at the top... Twice.    I'm so out of shape, it's pathetic. Two weeks ago I was running ten miles at a time. Now I'm a weak, coughing mess after just a couple miles. As I ran back down the sandy dirt road, my legs were so weak, I felt like I was ready to collapse, but I managed to make it back to my car.    I had a busy day ahead of me of being annoyed by people before a full day of work.... being annoyed by people. 

    I'm so disgusted by people in general today.

     This morning I went to the Social Security  office in Redlands. Besides Walmart and the dump, is there a sadder place on earth then your local Social Security Office? I need to get a new social security card and change my name, something I  have been putting off regarding my pending divorce.

     I've been  procrastinating going to the Social Security office for three months, because frankly,  scary people dwell there.

    Today's visit was no different.

    The two hobos  sitting behind me were having a conversation about how one of them had his  wallet stolen at a N.A. meeting in Big Bear City.

     Then they proceeded to  discuss how they needed new social security cards in order to find jobs.

     Did I mention  these guys we're both from Big Bear?

     Or that every other word out of there  mouthed was fuck?

     Fine language for their usual stomping grounds of N.A.  meetings, but every time Bubba uttered" fuck this or that or her" I litterly  felt the nice old lady sitting next to me shutter.

    Luckily, my wait at the Social Security office was only forty five minutes, not to long at all.

   I did manage to get the redneck's behind me to shut up, when my text message ringer went off, which is one long fart.

   Yeah, who's the Redneck Queen now, bitches?

   Guess I'm saying the waiting room at the Social Security Office isn't the best place for a farting cell phone, but is slightly better then when my cell phone went off in the Mob Museum in Las Vegas. Wops.

    I left the Social Security Office soon after this, and promptly sanitized my hands.

   Partially as the lady who assisted me was a sneezing coughing mess, and partly because when I pulled my wallet out of my hand bag, I discovered my bottle of cough syrup had exploded every where coming down the hill.

   Just try and infect me Social Security Germ Queen! I'm covered in a thin layer of Robitussin DM!

    I then grabbed some sushi, and went to the nice air conditioned break room at work, as it was a sweltering (To me) eighty two degrees outside.

    The first thing I did when  I walked into work was put my lunch in our employees refrigerator.

And  that's when I saw it.

The most unhealthy lunch ever.

One Cup O Noodles, a  bag of spicy pork rinds, a Coke and nacho cheese Doritos.

     I feel tempted to  find whoever owns this lunch, and say goodbye to them before their heart  explodes.

     Today I managed to run two and a half miles. I did it amid coughing  wheezing and gasping. 

I make myself run, so I don't turn into one of these  people I'm surrounded by daily.

The rednecks, the hippies, the unhealthy  people who binge on Coke all day.

I'm actually talking about sodas right now  and not the drug.

Every time I find myself surrounded by smokers I'm so disgusted  with what people do to their bodies. Life is so short, and every day I see people shortening their life stand with their horrible life style choices.

    It's just so sad.


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