I Don't Want Your Freedom

Kir writes for shoes & cupcakes at http://www.thekircorner.com

“Mommy, I do it. “ “Sweetheart, it’s too heavy, let mommy lift it.”

“No, Mommy. I. Do. It”

The milk bounces against small muscular legs but is eventually hoisted onto the table. ***********************************************************

“Come on, we need to get in the house”.

“Mommy, I put the code in?”

“Sweetheart, we’re running late, let mommy poke the numbers”.

“No, Mommy. I. do. It.”

And tiny hands remember the four numbers and the star key, a face raised in triumph and pride as the door swings open

**********************************************************

“It’s dinner time, please come in and sit down. Here are your forks.”

“Mommy, I wanted to pick my own fork”

“Sweetheart, this fork is just as good as any old fork. “

“But I wanted to PICK MY OWN FORK Mommy. I’ll. Do. It”

And standing on tippy toes little hands reach in among the plastic utensils to choose a fork that looks like that one sitting next to their plate already.

“This one”, they say.

*************************************************************************

Every day I watch you grow and stretch,

I sit in awe as you learn your way around this world and push yourselves to new places. Your first years were full of me doing everything for you both, of stretching beyond myself to provide you with the things you would need to be where you are today.

But as any mom will tell you, your independence is full of bittersweet moments. Watching you close a button or turn a movie on adept at the remote, brush your own teeth or pour your own cereal is an exercise in humility and letting go far too soon.

For every step you take toward freedom and self sufficiency, my heart folds upon itself in wanting to keep you here, keep you small, and keep you under lock and key.

So that one day, before I know it or can predict it’s arrival

"me do it” becomes...

"I do it, Mommy” becomes...

"I’ll do it myself Mom”

Evolves into

“Let me do that for you Mom”

and the world I know will shift once again.

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