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I’m pretty sure there’s a special hell reserved for people who use their children to increase their personal fame and promote ludicrous agendas. Believing that gave me new beginning as a political activist at midlife (Yo, Sarah Palin *waves*) and now forces me to write the word Pussification. <!--break-->
That’s the name of a “music video” created by the infamous Heene family, currently (and mysteriously, in my opinion) at large in Colorado. I’ll link it, below. In it, the three young sons of the family, approximately 5, 7, and 9, at the time, dance, sing and posture in costume to present their father’s opinion that they are the remaining force of “real masculinity” standing against “Soccer moms” and their husbands, known as “Pussies.”
Pajamas are pussified. I’ll bet you didn’t know that.
So much to say, so little time...
I’ll start with, “Women’s private parts are not negative.” If you haven’t had time, this week, to mention that to your children, show them this. I’m decades past being embarrassed by making sure our girls’ self-concepts aren’t hampered by this nastiness. All of them are beautiful, and they should know that.
I’ll follow that with, “It’s appropriate for parents to be concerned about their childrens’ safety.” I’d go further and say, it’s a main component of the job description. There’s room for honest debate about what actions we take to make our kids safe, but the concern isn’t worthy of mockery. Instead, that concern is something to honor.
I’ll follow that with, “It’s even appropriate for MEN to care about their children, or about children in general.” The Heene family seems to have somewhat eccentric, not to mention antiquated, notions about gender roles. That means that Mr. Heene doesn’t need to contribute to their daily upkeep, I understand. But even in more traditional families, fathers have (traditionally) responsibilities to provide for their children’s safety, welfare and education. The Heene family is a giant balloon, a round of the morning shows, and one entire episode of “Wife Swap” past any convincing demonstration of Mr. Heene’s dedication to those things. Therefore, he falls short of even a traditional assessment of male success, let alone a modern one, and has no credentials for promulgating his own.
Action plan.
First, and most obviously, boycott his Wife Swap episode. You know you can catch it on you tube later, just keep the TV off for that night. Don’t buy the magazine covers they’ll be on, either. Second, if you have kids, talk to your kids about self-concept and body image. Talk to them about offensive language, too. Third, LISTEN to kids about what messages they’re getting, about masculinity, about their bodies, about how they balance our expectations. Finally, listen to yourself, listen to what you’re telling the people around you about what’s important, and make sure you’re reflecting your real values.
I’ve compiled here a set of links about the balloon and the Heenes. For me, that little boy is at more risk growing up in that family than he’d ever be in a balloon with the National Guard looking out for him. Sadly, he’s not alone in that. Let’s use this occasion to redouble our efforts to keep our children safe, daily. Hate and stupidity are a risk, every day.
Balloon liftoff:
