I'm Going Back IN!!!!

It's been quite a while since I've posted anything. Since no one reads my blog, I figured no one would notice or care. No one did, but I decided to rejoin the universe of mommy bloggers anyway.

So here's what happened. A few months ago, I voluntarily gave up a part-time gig to return to work full time. Not exactly the best way to achieve life balance, I realize, and according to my grand plan, I had another year until my youngest was in kindergarten before I attempted re-entry into full time professional life. But, I hit a wall and had to do something.

Those of you (you being the legions of loyal followers of Up With Moms) who covet a part time job and think that it's the answer to all of your mommy woes probably think I'm insane. I fully admit, it was a very good job with a great organization I've been with forever. It even came with a decent salary and benefits. But even part time gigs have their limitations for us moms. After doing the job happily for several years, I started noticing that I wasn't getting very challenging assignments. And my non-mommy colleagues were getting promoted beyond me. One even got promoted OVER me, which diminished the stature of my job. I finally realized that my part time job had landed me squarely on the dreaded mommy track and eventually the professional in me started rebelling.

Professional Amy: I'm bored. This is bull#@!

Mommy Amy: What do you mean? I'm very happy.

Professional Amy: Happy? How can you be happy? Your career is going NOWHERE!

Mommy Amy: I don't know what you're talking about. I have a great job.

Professional Amy: Yes, that's right. You have a job but not a career.

Mommy Amy: Well, so what? I have the best of both worlds. I get to work and be with the kids. Most women would kill for this.

Professional Amy: But are you learning anything? Are you being mentally challenged? C'MON you could do this job in your sleep! What's the point?

Mommy Amy: I get benefits...that's important...

Professional Amy: Oh good. Benefits will get you far in life. How do you plan to parlay benefits into a career goal? The kids won't need you forever, you know. You need to get a life.

Mommy Amy: I don't know what you're talking about...

Professional Amy: Look, I've sacrificed brain cells for the past four years so you can be the perfect mom. It's my turn now. It's time to get serious about work.

Mommy Amy: But...but...what about the kids?

Professional Amy: The kids will be just fine. You'll do quality time with them after work and on the weekends. Anyway, its time they had some more quality time with their dad. You know he'll help fill the gap if you're bringing in more money.

Mommy Amy: I don't know...

Professional Amy: The kids are starting to have their own lives. Time to jump start yours again. We're going back to work!

I'm sure many of you have the same kind of schizophrenic inner dialogue. So Professional Amy won out this time. Do you ever think there will be a day when both Amy's can be satisfied? I'm still holding out hope.

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