I'm Sorry What's the Plan Now?
The fact that I'm not writing to you from my local BURN unit right
now is a miracle. You see I put the oven on 425 degrees (I'm telling
you "degrees" just in case you thought it was pounds) and walked away.
After ten minutes, I opened the broiler because that is where the pan
was and proceeded to use my bare hands to try and remove it from said
broiler so that I might put it in the oven.
Why, oh why, I thought, after sitting in the broiler for ten minutes that this thing
not be SCALDING HOT is beyond me but then again, if you could have seen
how I wore my hair back in the early 90's you might actually point out
to me that, really Jessica, how surprised can you be?
Well, certainly no more surprised than finding out that this year, because the State
of California cannot come up with a budget, it will be giving it's taxpayers an IOU instead of an actual
refund, which of course leads me to ask:
JESSICA: Hey there, California, how about I give you an IOU for my taxes?
What a brilliant idea.. FOR THEM.
I mean, wouldn't it be great if in OUR daily lives we could just hand over an IOU to
anybody in lieu of actual money. Imagine how it would feel to say to
Tires look great. Engine sounds good
and then hand him a piece of paper
with the words, "IOU $____.00" and have him let you leave WITH your car
but WITHOUT a man named "MOOSE BALLS" following you home and then threatening to "hurt you very badly" unless you paid up ASAP.
whole IOU thing was very common in my marriage, although it rarely
involved money. I can't tell you the number of times one of us would
say to the other, "You were great last night. I owe you one", which for
my husband meant exactly what it seems like it meant while I would be
along the lines of maybe doing his laundry for a week or taking the dogs out the next morning.
some point, my ex even suggested putting a tote board up on the fridge
just to make sure neither party was being egregiously "neglected".
with the IOU idea, California has also now informed its citizens that
many of the state's employees will no longer be working on Fridays,
which if you've ever been to the DMV or the local
will agree is a bandwagon these people appeared to have jumped on years
ago, the only difference being that now they're no longer going to get
paid for it. Quite frankly, there are times I've walked into a
municipal office building and could have sworn they were told not to
bother working AT ALL.
Hmmmm....You know, with my work history, perhaps I should
work for the state.
Which reminds me, it's time for my nap.
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