It's Like People WANT Me to Slap Them

I love my mom. I love my dad. I love my sister-in-law. I am sure that everyone who is telling mom that my niece, Gozer the Destructor (AKA Betty Jr), doesn’t need testing for autism is saying it with the best of intentions.

I am still gonna slap the piss out of everyone who thinks Gozer does not have Autism because she is “too social”, and thus no point in testing her for it.  

My mom is now whining and dithering about testing Gozer because “people” have told her OF COURSE her sweetpea doesn’t have Asperger’s syndrome. Sure, Gozer had impulse control issues, walks on her toes, stims, and freaks out if you change plans or take her somewhere crowded, but that isn’t Autistic! To have Autism you have to be non-verbal and/or stereotypical Rainman, dontcha know!

Obviously, they don’t have a fucking CLUE how verbal girl-aspys can be. These people, who think they are experts on Autism because they can diagnose a little boy with 8 out of 10 “classic” signs, drive me bananas. And by “bananas” I mean “into a barely leashed homicidal rage”.

There is an epidemic of undiagnosed girls with Autism. Many times, female Autism looks different than the male version. The good-hearted idiots mistake an ability to survive for normalcy.  They don’t understand that NOT having a diagnosis if you have Autism is to spend your life feeling like you are a stupid, oafish normal person. More to the point, THEY fucking don’t have Asperger’s and they should shut their fucking pieholes until they are actually qualified to comment on it.  

They should especially not say, “Well, they’ll test her until they find something,” in a sneering voice because I will rip their throats open with my teeth.

Just for jollies, here is some of the reasons why female Asperger's/Autism is missed/overlooked:

“the different way in which girls and women present under the following headings; social understanding, social communication, social imagination which is highly associated with routines, rituals and special interests. Some examples cited in the paper are:

  • Girls are more able to follow social actions by delayed imitation because they observe other children and copy them, perhaps masking the symptoms of Asperger syndrome (Attwood, 2007).
  • Girls are often more aware of and feel a need to interact socially. They are involved in social play, but are often led by their peers rather than initiating social contact. Girls are more socially inclined and many have one special friend.
  • In our society, girls are expected to be social in their communication. Girls on the spectrum do not ‘do social chit chat’ or make ‘meaningless’ comments in order to facilitate social communication. The idea of a social hierarchy and how one communicates with people of different status can be problematic and get girls into trouble with teachers.
  • Evidence suggests that girls have better imagination and more pretend play  (Knickmeyer et al, 2008). Many have a very rich and elaborate fantasy world with imaginary friends. Girls escape into fiction, and some live in another world with, for example, fairies and witches.
  • The interests of girls in the spectrum are very often similar to those of other girls – animals, horses, classical literature – and therefore are not seen as unusual. It is not the special interests that differentiate them from their peers but it is the quality and intensity of these interests. Many obsessively watch soap operas and have an intense interest in celebrities.

The presence of repetitive behaviour and special interests is part of the diagnostic criteria for an autism spectrum disorder. This is a crucial area in which the male stereotype of autism has clouded the issue in diagnosing girls and women.

As highlighted above, the current international diagnostic criteria do not give examples of the types of difficulties experienced by girls and women. In order to recognise the different behavioural manifestations, it is important to take a much wider perspective regarding the social, communication and imagination dimensions in addition to the special interests and rigidity of behaviour. The girls and women learn to act in social settings. Unenlightened diagnosticians perceive someone who appears able and who has reciprocal conversation and who uses appropriate affect and gestures as not fulfilling the criteria set out in the international classification systems. Therefore a diagnosis is missed. It is only by asking the right questions, taking a developmental history, and observing the person in different settings, that it becomes clear that the individual has adopted a social role which is based on intellect rather than social intuition. To quote: “The fact that girls with undiagnosed autism are painstakingly copying some behaviour is not picked up and therefore any social and communication problems they may be having are also overlooked. This sort of mimicking and repressing their autistic behaviour is exhausting, perhaps resulting in the high statistics of women with mental health problems.” (Dale Yaull-Smith, 2008).

It is important to prepare girls for a life of quality as adult women.”

Early diagnosis is crucial. The earlier the treatment starts, the sooner you can fake normal and keep the muggles happy.

If “THEY” try to stop me from getting checked to make sure she isn’t on the spectrum, if she is on the spectrum and they try to leave her hanging in the breeze for their own mental security and false sense of expertise, I will fucking go Full Out Fokker on them and you will all have to pool your loose change for my bail money.

*RAGE*

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