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While spending a little time, okay a lot of time, on youtube the other night, I found a video, "Lesbian Stereotypes," by Emilythecrazy. It made me laugh every time she hit on a stereotype I fall, or at one time fell into. I didn't know some of the stereotypes still existed, or at least not for the younger lesbian crowd. I mean, Birkenstocks? Really? Are they still popular lesbian footware? I haven't had a pair since I was in college in the early 90's, and everyone had a pair of Jesus sandals. What about Doc Martin's, are they no longer a lesbian stereotype? And shouldn't Chuck Taylor's be?
The video got me thinking about how stereotypes may have changed, but how the old ones still stick with me. When I was Emilythecrazy's age, my early 20's, back in the early-mid 90's, some lesbian stereotypes I remember were; Birkenstocks, black Doc Martin's, small silver hoop ear rings, flannel shirts (though I think that was a carry over from before my time because grunge came in the early 90's and for a brief time confused some people), softball, vegetarian, feminist, Melissa Etheridge or Ani DiFranco or Indigo Girls fan, pickup trucks, mullets, cats, and dog/wolf hybrids. Even now, if I saw a woman with mullet, wearing a flannel shirt, driving a pickup truck, my gaydar would certainly be biased towards indicating lesbian, though in the Midwest there is also a reasonably high probability that she would be straight. Sometimes Midwestern woman screw up my gaydar and I need to recalibrate.
So I set off to find current lesbian stereotypes. After reading Little Miss Drinkalot's post Discovering my lesbian side, I think I might be wrong about the relevance of Birks as a stereotype.
Anyway, The Girlfriend was teasing me because I recently bought a pair of Birkenstocks.
See, you're turning lesbian.
No I'm not.
What's that you're wearing on your feet now?
I bought them because I thought they'd be comfortable!
Doesn't matter, you still bought them.
In the post she also lists cargo pants, G-shock or Tag Heuer watches, and Rav-4s as stereotypes. Cargo pants are a check in the lesbian column with me too. I'll have to trust her judgment on the watch, I thought everyone just used their cell phone to tell time. Who still wears a watch? The car? Maybe, I don't know. I would have gone with a Subaru, but perhaps that just for the lesbians over 35.
Lesbian Said What??, got into the more serious stereotypes about lesbians in her post Myths of Homosexuality.
MYTH #2: All lesbians are either butch or femme.
Some gay women are, but many believe they do not have to adopt such restrictive roles in order to express their love of women. This does not mean we should pass judgment on those women who are in butch-femme relationships and who are happy with their roles. The butch-femme myth stems from the visibility of the butch lesbian. The butch lesbian also reinforces the myth that lesbians can not get a man and the butch- femme relationship is acting out the man-woman relationship which is what all women really want. Lesbianism is NOT a dislike of men. Lesbianism is an inclination, a positive emotional, physical attraction to other women. Lesbianism (& homosexuality) is not just a sexual activity - it is something that spans beyond a person's physical behavior. (We all are either butch of femme, just like men.)
Unfortunately, I think the perception of all lesbian relationships being butch/femme will be around a for long time. I think until gender roles disappear or become less important in society as a whole, many will struggle to comprehend how a gay relationship works. I mean someone has to be he man. Right? Does that not irritate anyone else when people ask that?
The Cranky Lesbian, posed an interesting question in her post, How Do You Prove You Are Gay?
If you were seeking asylum in another country from persecution for being gay, but you had no evidence because you had to be completely closeted or be persecuted, how would you prove it?
Everything I came up with sounds like a lame joke. I'd probably point to my sneakers first. If that didn't do the trick, I might hand over my iPod. The problem with relying














