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I have to admit, I am thankful for you. However, what I have to say may hurt……What are you doing to me? We’ve been together for 33 years and yet we still don’t understand each other. At 12, We fell in love with horses and that was the best move we ever made. They are amazing creatures. The best part of our equestrian infatuation is that when we are totally befuddled me I can always go back to the horses to gain clarity. They are pure, beautiful and peaceful. That was the first gift from you and for that I will be forever grateful.
Since I fell for horses, there have been many times you have led me astray. I meandered through dating. Finding my first true Love , loosing you to him, to only have you broken by him. I was devastated. How could I have trusted you and you let us fall in love with him? What did I do to deserve that? It took me a long time to recover from that. Our love and loss of him became part of us. Supposedly, we learned and grew from that experience. Though sometimes I wonder if we have forgotten what we learned.
As I continued with my life, I tried to follow you, but sometimes we were disjointed. Other times, I blatantly ignored you. We have yet to find the satisfaction of being truly passionate about our work. We have let the conservative brain lead us in many aspects. Slowly we came back together and found a fellow I thought we agreed on. We loved for a time. You showed me true unconditional love in my children. They are amazing in their own rights and I hope they are able to follow their hearts.
Yet again, we are at a turning point. We aren’t as happy as we once were with this man I thought we had agreed on. It’s no one’s fault. You and I feel that something’s wrong. We are again lost and struggling. I only hope you will be the stronger one and lead me to the truth. It’s your turn to lead…..I will follow. Please take care of us.
