The Day My Dad Died

I awoke to swollen eyes. Lids so tight. Like a pressure cooker on high. Blinking took less effort. Eyes were barely open. Sinuses full with equal pressure. My heart feeling as heavy as anvil. I miss him.That was a lot of tears. The sad heavy kind. The kind that flow with no control, a deep ache within. Arms extended to receive a hug that isn’t there....more

Changing the Lens of Loss Brings Focus to Life

The other day I received two texts from two husbands - past and present - at the same time. Bing bing. I didn’t know they were both texting me, I was precariously in plank position on my yoga mat in my bedroom, solid on my left toes and balancing on the big toe of my right foot - the one with a broken fourth toe. I’ve gotten really adept at using my big toe to manage the needs of my decrepit foot. It takes some concentration, and feels like I’m tempting fate. ...more

Those Small Fleeting Moments

Probably the worst show for me to watch is called “Time of Death” it documents people, in the final stages of their lives and how they and their family cope and plan for the inevitable....more

Aladdin Sane

"I hate to tell you," said the Husband, looking at me appraisingly in the dim light of the kitchen, "but David Bowie died last night.""No," I said, shaking my head and backing away.  "No.  No, no, no, no, no.  Not him.  No."The Husband shrugged.  "Look it up on CNN," he suggested....more

What I learned from death today.

My coworker died this weekend. ...more

On Loss, Lessons, and the Meaning of 'Wolf Winter'

"My daughter, when it ends, it ends," my father said. "There is nothing more to it than that and there is nothing you can do about it. In time, there will be something new; still wonderful, still worthwhile." ...more
A beautiful essay. Your father sounds like a wise and wonderful man. I'm going to think about ...more

Labels of Thanks

 Nail Party (puts smiles on my nails and helps a friend make sales). Breaded Mushrooms ...more

November Notes, Day 6

 "The Death of George Bell" I just read ...more

How do you sum up a life?

At a previous job, one of my responsibilities was to read through obituaries to be included in an alumni magazine. ...more