Losing Weight is No Easy Thing

I watched the Biggest Loser a few times and recognized that what they were doing was hard stuff, but not until I finally decided to lose weight did I fully understand just how hard it is to do what the contestants have been doing.

I am lucky in that I was given a chance to stay home with my kids and not work for a period of time.  Working, taking care of life and taking care of myself wasn't happening and I'd been slowly and steadily gaining weight.

So, beginning on January 3, 2012 I became a stay at home mom with enough time to finally focus on myself!

My new year's resolutions were three fold:  First, Myself.  Second, My Kids and family.  Third, Working and writing here and there.

It was hard to just stick to that because I found myself picking up the computer before stepping onto the elliptical.  So I had to keep reminding myself of my resolutions.

It's easy to blog every day for a month (I did it successfully one month a while ago), but I've never made it through more than five days of Ana Cabon's Beginner Pilates Mat Workout even though she promises I'll "feel better in just 10 days and have a whole new body in 15 days" (or something to that effect).

I also don't want to really join the club of people on diets so I am stubbornly refusing to call what I am doing a diet.  But it is.  This is what I have done:

Counted calories in using a free application on my iPhone and maintained a 1200 a day calorie count.

Done 8 Minute Abs every day since the 3rd

Ordered Jillian's 30 Day Shred DVD and completed the first level ("completed" does not mean done well by any means) for four or maybe five days in a row.

It's HARD!  And if I was working, there is NO WAY I'd be able to keep this focus on any of it.  Possibly I could fit in the 8 minute abs because I rather like the music and the way the guy says, "Hey Gang!", but no way could I stick to the calorie counting.

It's just plain hard.  And it takes so much constant maintenance from your brain to stick with it and ride it out.  I feel like I move around the house constantly dramatically flopping down and crying out how HUNGRY I am.  Granted, I was having a lot of acid production that made me feel really hungry right after I'd eaten, but a few tums settled that down.   But even with the hunger pains gone, it's just hard.

And that's where I appreciate that I am not working and that I do not have other stressors going on in my life.  I can see why people desire to go away to a place such as the Biggest Loser ranch because changing everything about how you interact with food is challenging and even more so if your family doesn't really get it.  

But this is why I am so impressed with the people on the Biggest Loser (which I've really only watched twice).

When I popped in Jillian's video and started Level One, I knew I was out of shape (180 pounds on a 5 foot 2 frame), but I didn't really expect to see how horrible I looked.  I couldn't help but envision video cameras filming me as I cursed at her for not modifying the jumping jacks (which I modified) and the cameras zooming in on my butt kicks where I did not bounce lightly on the floor, but rather thudded, nor the sit ups which I just plain old cheated on.

Those poor folks who go in to the Biggest Loser on day one were puking and passing out.  I don't think I could push myself to that place.  I think I'd be cheating all over.  Perhaps not.  Perhaps that is the occasion people rise to, but man oh man - it's quite the occasion and I give huge hats off to the people who stick with it.

So it's been 13 days of my focus on myself and it's going well enough.  I'm certain I'm making progress, but I don't really know what it is yet.  I've recently developed an intense craving for salt and I munched down a bunch of pickles and anchovies yesterday (I'm not pregnant) and so I think I'm retaining a touch of water.  Certainly I feel a touch more toned and the exercises I'm doing are slightly easier and I know my calorie intake has been within the appropriate boundaries.

But it's hard and I am truly impressed with others out there who are going through the process.

Hats off!

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