Balance
Maria Shriver Answers Questions about The Shriver Report
by Erin Kotecki Vest

The findings of The Shriver Report: A Woman’s Nation Changes Everything have caused quite a stir here at BlogHer.

I recently connected with Maria Shriver only days before The Women’s Conference-- to learn more about what it means to live in A Woman’s Nation – where, for the first time in our nation’s history, women make up half of the country’s workforce and are the primary or co-breadwinners in two-thirds of American families.

Erin Kotecki Vest: Where do women flourish?

Maria Shriver: Women are flourishing in the workforce as never before in our nation’s history. One-half of all U.S. workers are women, and women are the primary or co-breadwinners in two-thirds of American families. But, despite this seismic shift, our nation’s institutions – government, business, education, faith and media – have not caught up with the realities of the American family. Women may be flourishing in the workplace, but, on the equality front, from equal pay to family policies, there is still a long way to go. My hope is that The Shriver Report: A Woman’s Nation Changes Everything will ignite a much-needed national dialogue on what has to happen next.

Erin Kotecki Vest: Work-life balance is something we hear about all the time at BlogHer. What did your study find?

Maria Shriver: In our report, at The Women’s Conference and around kitchen tables across America, women - and men – are talking about how stressed they feel, particularly when it comes to financial security. Most families need two paychecks. However women, despite their increasing work responsibilities, still see themselves, as society does, as the primary caretakers of their children and their aging parents. This situation is made even more difficult because so many companies and institutions are not being responsive. We need more flexible work schedules, better child care and paid family and medical leave. It’s time to start thinking about “women’s” issues as “family” issues. Women say they are afraid to ask for time off or more flexible hours to deal with the demands of childcare or elder care. This is one of the reasons why so many women would like to leave their companies and start their own businesses. In fact, the number of women working for themselves doubled from 1979 to 2003 with women making up 35% of all self-employed people. So, yes, the struggle to resolve work-life balance issues is paramount right now in the lives of American women. We’ve found that the life balance articles on The Women’s Conference website are consistently amongst our most popular. Women are looking for guidance on how to best cope.

Erin Kotecki Vest: At BlogHer we have many different "voices" of women- all with different priorities and issues. Is it tough to narrow down some of the biggest issues facing women today or did you see a common thread?

Maria Shriver: The common thread is that women today feel that never before has so much been asked of them, and never before have they given so much. And they are concerned about the impact this is having on their families. When The Women’s Conference sold out in just a couple of hours last year, it hit me that something profound was happening. Women were telling me that they felt increasingly isolated, stressed and misunderstood. They felt that the government, businesses, institutions and the media were all out-of-touch with who they are today and what they need to survive and prosper. The voices of these women – from all walks of life - were the genesis of our report. I must point out that men are certainly doing more to share in the responsibilities. One of our more interesting findings was that the battle of the sexes is over and has been replaced by negotiations -- about work, family, household responsibilities, childcare and eldercare. And men agree with women that it’s time for our institutions to step up to the plate and respond to the needs of the American family as it exists today. The emergent economic power of women is not going away and it gives us a seat at the table – at the head of the table.

Submitted by Erin Kotecki Vest (view blog) on Thu, 10/22/2009 - 7:23am

Comments

 

Love this

"It’s time to start thinking about “women’s” issues as “family” issues"

I love this quote.

I wish I could attend this conference. It sounds amazing.

Submitted by loraleechoate on Thu, 10/22/2009 - 11:20
 

One thing we kept noticing during the
election...

Was that women's issues were exactly that, family issues and issues that affect everyone. Iraq, the economy, all hit our families and were therefor 'women's issues' by default. I do like the 'family issues' rewording because it reminds everyone that EVERYONE should be concerned with these things- even the traditional 'women's' issues. 

 

Politics & News Contributing Editor Queen of Spain

Submitted by Erin Kotecki Vest on Thu, 10/22/2009 - 12:16
 

Maria is annoying me

I am sorry to say, Maria's "Woman's Nation" is annoying me. Shouldn't we be a "People's Nation" at this point in history?

http://mothershaffer.wordpress.com/2009/10/21/a-peoples-nation/

Submitted by Mothershaffer on Thu, 10/22/2009 - 11:51
 

I think the point is we still have a way to
go

 

We don't make as much, we still do most of the 'household' things- and while you and I may be lucky in our marriages...many women still are not and struggle to find that balance. Even with the help I get, I still struggle. 

Politics & News Contributing Editor Queen of Spain

Submitted by Erin Kotecki Vest on Thu, 10/22/2009 - 12:18
 

Alienating Women Without Children

I'd like to advance and echo an observation made by Melanie Notkin, Founder, SavvyAuntie.com, about Ms. Shriver's new study:  

"It might as well have been called: A Mother's Nation Changes Everything. The study, meant to change the way government policy and businesses modernize with the new standing of women in the economy - a change I completely support - interchanges the word "woman" with 'mother' so often it's as if all women are mothers."

Melanie also points out that the 2006 US Census Report on Fertility reported that 45.1% of women up to the age of 44 did not have kids. And that number has been steadily growing over the last couple of decades.

My two cents: We need to stop assuming that all women are or will be mothers. At best, for those of us without children this assumption is off-putting (hello, are we invisible?) and, at worst, it's alienating...

 

 

Pamela Tsigdinos

http://www.SilentSorority.com

Submitted by Pamela Jeanne on Thu, 10/22/2009 - 12:55
 

Thanks for chiming in Pamela

Joanne also addressed that point in her post 

http://www.blogher.com/maria-shriver-says-its-womans-nation-do-you

with comments from Elisa Camahort Page, co-founder here at BlogHer. 

 

 

Politics & News Contributing Editor Queen of Spain

Submitted by Erin Kotecki Vest on Thu, 10/22/2009 - 14:10
 

Yup, I think it was false advertising

It should have been entitled Mother's Nation. Because otherwise you cannot help but read the executive summary and realize that in this study's lexicon woman=mother. Meaning, non-mother=non-woman.

Oddly enough, I attended Shriver's Women's Conference last year and did not get that vibe AT ALL. It seemed very much, universally, to be for and about women.

I'd go even one step further and say that my worth and womanhood is also not tied up in whether or not I am a loving aunt to nieces and nephews, even if I am. Woman does not equal having to have children in one's life even. That bugs me as much. 

In my case, I do happen to be a business owner. With employees. And on the boards of a couple of non-profits. Contributing to society too, you know? And someone who's got to prepare for my own retirement, knowing I, in fact, don't have children who will end up being able to help. Talk about pressure.

As I said on Twitter: I think it's great to advocate for moms and their issues and their needs. Just don't pretend that every woman's story. That's all I ask. MomsRising is a perfect example. Words matter.

Elisa Camahort Page BlogHer elisa@blogher.com My BlogHer profile truly shows you everything I do online...Check it out!!

Submitted by Elisa Camahort on Thu, 10/22/2009 - 14:37
 

Speaking up matters...

Could not agree more. Mothers today have more share of voice than ever before but they're not the only voices out there. Unless we non-moms (by choice or chance) speak up and emphasize the contributions of *all* women we will continue to be left out of the equation.

Thanks, Erin and Elisa, for providing a platform for this conversation.

Pamela Tsigdinos

http://www.SilentSorority.com

Submitted by Pamela Jeanne on Thu, 10/22/2009 - 15:09
 

One real change

"The Alzheimer’s Association and the National Alliance for Caregiving estimate that men make up nearly 40 percent of family care providers now, up from 19 percent in a 1996 study by the Alzheimer’s Association. About 17 million men are caring for an adult." - New York Times, 11/28/08 (http://www.blogher.com/men-increasingly-serve-caregivers-elderly-parents)

That surprises me.  But what really surprises me is that no one is talking about this seismic change in the way we talk about how men still shirk household chores when kids are involved. 

Yes, these are family issues that affect men, too.

Suzanne Reisman, Contributing Editor - Feminism & Gender Campaign for Unshaved Snatch (CUSS) & Oth

Submitted by Suzanne Reisman on Thu, 10/22/2009 - 20:10
 

Disappointing effort

It's nice that this report has come out, but I really have to wonder -- how does it really move us forward?  I have been extremely disappointed in the TV coverage of it, with NBC and MSNBC choosing to focus on panels of husbands talking about how they have to chip in around the house more.  I'm also a bit put off by the contention that just because there are more women in the workforce, that means we're doing better.  We still only get paid 77 cents for every dollar a many makes, and it's been reported that women who are getting jobs in this economy are being paid less than if men took those jobs.  That's not really a step forward.

Shriver and the CAP could have done so much more with this.  I'm truly disappointed at an opportunity lost.  We all know that we have a long way to go -- imagine how much better this report would have been if they had "gone deep" and really connected with employers and businesses about why they don't do things to help families that clearly are in everybody's best economic interests.

PunditMom

aka Joanne Bamberger

BlogHer News & Politics Contributing Editor

Submitted by PunditMom on Fri, 10/23/2009 - 05:57
 

I also just found out ....

I've been trying since the conference call to access the full report, but the pdf on the various sites doesn't work.  Now I see on Twitter that if I want to read the full report, I have to but the E-book for $20 ?!?!  There's something just not right there.

PunditMom

aka Joanne Bamberger

BlogHer News & Politics Contributing Editor

Submitted by PunditMom on Fri, 10/23/2009 - 10:15