Jordan Rocks

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Splish-splash, I was taking a - OW!, - Or epic shower fail

As I've stated before, I have a knack for doing awesome things. Evidence:...more

Ok, not exactly the same scenario but about a month ago I feel out of the shower. I didn't even ...more

monster where art thou?

I am a bit distressed. You see I am not very good with keeping tract of my errrrr 'friend' (i do think that is a really ridiculous term, no other friend of mine comes over uninvited and tortures me for 4-6 days without mercy, so from here on out we will refer to it simply as 'the monster') ...more

I must have missed this booth on career day...

While perusing the internets this afternoon, I came across this article courtesy of  The Boston Globe:  COPENHAGEN—Scores of Carlsberg workers have walked off their jobs to protest the Danish brewer's new limits on beer drinking at work. Carlsberg spokesman Jens Bekke says 250 warehouse and production workers and truck drivers went on strike Thursday on the second day of a rebellion against the new rules, which state workers can only drink beer in the canteen during the lunch break....more

stop looking at me swan!

Something very annoying happened this afternoon. I arrived home from the gym, my hair so greasy it appeared as if I had stood under the liquid butter machine at the movie theater, and decided a shower was in order. I hopped in and started scrubbing away. I lathered  up with shampoo, rinsed, and went for the conditioner.It let out a sad, little squirt and it was done.* Shit.  This always happens to me. I use whhhaaaaaayyy more conditioner then shampoo, so I run out of the one before I'm even half done with the other....more

Pink Slip

Have you ever seen something that is just so wrong on so many levels that you are not sure if you will be able to go on living if you do not share it with others? I awoke to an email from a dear friend that directed me to this little jem. I'm not sure what the proper introduction to this is, so without further ado: OK. Can I just say-  Word panties used 7 times "C'mon, I'll show you I'm having my period right now" ...more

JennyLove I got your back!

This morning one of my coworkers threw a magazine at me and said:"That Jennifer Love Hewitt has some issues" My stomach tightened on reflex and I bared my teeth and hissed: "Leave her alone""Fine. Freak." she said as she sashayed out of my office. Jennifer Love and I have a bond, you see. We went through a break up together. ...more

Get me to a meeting! STAT!

My name is Jordan and I'm a picker. There. I've said it. Try as hard as I might to resist picking I cannot do it. I've been like this as long as I can remember. It's turned into an addiction, I can't just stop. It's not even that fun anymore, just something I am compelled to do to make it through the day....more

My husband got snippy with me the other night when he found only vanilla ice cream left in ...more