My Children Love Me. They Love Me Not.

It’s been a rough week with the kids…and it’s only Thursday. They’ve loved me. They’ve hated me. They’ve been amazing. They’ve been horrible. My heart has swelled with joy and love. It has been plagued by disappointment and sadness. My realization this week is that life with kids sometimes bears a strange resemblance to the toxic relationships you swore off in your youth.Don’t believe me? All the signs are there....more
@DesiValentine4 Yes, I'll drink -- I mean consume my fruit and legumes -- to that!more

Demystifying the Mammogram

Boobs. Ta Tas. Breasts. Hooters. Call them what you want, ladies. We all have them. If you were writing a little ditty about them, it might start off a little something like this: “Some are big, and some are small. When you get older, they start to fall.” But I digress…...more

What Parents Say and What Kids Hear

I was troubled recently. My twin toddlers seemed completely unable to hear me, or worse yet, they were choosing to ignore me. Thankfully, I have discovered the root of the problem. It’s not that they can’t hear me; it’s that what I am saying isn’t translating correctly into their toddler brains. To help parents tackle this difficult issue and understand their toddlers better, I have created a toddler/parent translation guide to accompany the class I am going to teach on the subject. Et voila....more
@TiaBach Ha ha -- I have definitely experienced that one as well!more

The Good, The Bad, and The Rest of Bedrest

Someone asked me recently about being on bedrest. What is it like? Were you going out of your head with boredom? How did you manage?By way of background, I went on bedrest during the 24th week of my pregnancy with the twins. Because I had a two year old and no care lined up, the next few weeks involved a balancing act between our television me watching our daughter and family and friends watching our daughter....more
@SarahKnight There are some days when I think it would be so nice just to be told to stay in ...more

I Killed Another Parent’s Dreams

I scared someone the other day. Not just scared them as in “boo,” but scared them as in shattered their dreams, stole their hope, burst their bubble, etc. The look on this poor man’s face was indescribable in its horror. And I have to admit, it made me laugh just a bit....more
@DesiValentine4 Ha ha ha ha ha, too true! And, my hat is off to you for managing a six-man crew ...more

My Angry Inner Mom

Have you ever looked across the room only to see one of your children biting the other? I’m not talking a quick snap, but a full-on, jaw-locked, whole-head-trembling-from-the-force-of-the-bite bite? The kind where the bitee isn’t even screaming yet, but is instead paralyzed from shock and pain? I have. In fact, I have witnessed it often....more

What Would Your Stay-At-Home Mom Resume Say?

Stay-at-home moms get this question – or some variation of it – a lot: “Do you think you will return to work?” or “Do you miss work?” To clear up some misconceptions, I never stopped working. I stopped working for money. I do not miss work. I work an overwhelming amount. Every day. Every night. In fact, my three bosses are relentless. They are overly demanding, whiny, and some days they do nothing but yell at me. But I digress…back to the subject at hand. Will I return to the work-for-pay world? One would hope, right? But first, I will need to update my resume....more
@DesiValentine4 Thanks! It is definitely a week of polishing up my zookeeper skills. Am having ...more

What Does Your Anniversary Say About You?

We recently celebrated our 9th wedding anniversary. We went to a great restaurant, had dinner by candlelight, went back to our hotel, and went to sleep. I slept for nine hours. It was glorious. By pre-kid standards, this anniversary was wholly lacking. By post-kid standards, it was…again…glorious. But it did make me think a little bit about how our anniversaries say a lot about where we are in our lives....more
@SarahKnight I need another anniversary right now -- I could really use another night of sleep ...more

Parenting Milestones – That Aren’t

Parenting milestones – they are always a hot topic in the parenting set. Is your child talking, walking, potty trained, and so on? When can we expect it to happen? Should we be worried? Should we not be worried?Sometimes these milestones are cause for concern. The book said Johnny would be walking by now. Is something wrong?...more
@SarahKnight These are the things they never tell you about parenthood...sigh. We are about to ...more

A Little Fear is a Good Thing

A long time ago in a galaxy far far away (I say that to protect the identities of the innocent), I was asked to read an excerpt from a book at a very public event. By way of background, few things strike fear in my heart as much as speaking in public. Imagine if you will, blotchy red spots on my face (but just for a minute, and then let’s pretend that never happened). Now insert slightly awkward labored breathing. And for kicks, let’s throw in a touch of a cracking, wobbly voice. You get the picture....more
@DesiValentine4 Life is more interesting when there is enough crazy to go around ;)more