Mermaid or Beached Whale? That is the Question!

Do I feel like a beached whale or a mermaid? That is the question. It's a question we most likely ask ourselves on almost a daily basis. That is at least if u were me who has been battling weight all of my life. I'm sure you may not use the same cliche comparison of a whale, rhino, or walrus however. Lol

I got gastric bypass surgery done 11/5/12 because I felt as if I were just getting bigger and bigger and more and more unhealthy. My dad had just passed unexpectedly in May and his death made me want to do better. It made me want to get healthy for him and my baby girl. I could never stick to anything before but something in me just clicked and I knew I had to! I had to do something to change my predicament that I got myself in. Sure, it was easy to blame other people, Ben &jerry's, and fast food. But when it came down to it I was the one who ate that stuff. I was the one who remained sedentary. I had to act and this tool was what I needed to motivate me to get my stuff in gear! I know am almost 3 months post op. I feel so wonderful! I sleep better, have no aches and pains, and can wear a smaller size already and I have just begun! It is not easy! U have next to no appetite, have to focus on taking vitamins, and sometimes u can't eat what u want because ur stomach can't handle it. U still have to exercise willpower and exercise just like regular diet so please don't think I took the easy way out as I have been told before. I currently keep track of everything that goes in to my body with my fitness pal iPhone app, I look at every label that goes in my cart, and I go to the gym four or more times a week as well as do my at home walking video. It just feels so good to move and be able to! Funny thing is, when I'm at the gym or in clothes I feel so great! But when I take off my clothes, I feel just as ugly as being over 300lbs and that is 55lbs later. I feel my confidence has improved so much at the gym and I just smile and feel happier and less stressed out. But when I go to get in the shower I feel like a blob. It's so confusing to feel fat and thin at the same time. I guess u could say I have a body image identity crisis! I keep hearing that it will get better and that I will lose so much more weight than I have as of now. But will I really feel it? Or will I have so much excess skin I'll be wishing for my fat back? I guess that is the question now that only time can tell. :)

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