The Constant

There's no "team" anymore.  I'm divorced.There wasn't really much of a "team" anyway -- but that's another sorted tale....more

Divorce Poison. A book ever divorced parent with shared custody needs to read.

I had to share a book I’m reading right now and that every parent going through a divorce absolutely needs to read. The book is Divorce Poison: How to Protect Your Family from Bad-mouthing and Brainwashingby Dr. Richard A....more

Shuffling our kids around

My parents separated and divorced when I was in junior high school. Although I am not sure of the exact terms of the custody arrangement, I can say that my brother and I lived with our Mom and visited our Dad for a few weeks during the summer. I am pretty sure this was because we lived in South Carolina and my Dad lived in Indiana. ...more

Mothers Without Custody

I have an MA in Psychology and many years of work in large corporations with great jobs. When I had a baby, my ex husband and I agreed that working from home would be the best option since we both had long commutes. I quit my full time well paying job to work part time from home and be a full time stay at home mom. I cooked and cleaned, took care of our child and worked. My ex husband made over 100K a year and came home to a warm dinner each night and a happy, safe, well cared for child....more
tschalk1967  Thank you for writing. I can understand how difficult it must be for you to have ...more

Looking Down the Barrel of Parental Alienation

<cite>Image: Shutterstock</cite>It was a pretty day and I had just left an interview with a new client. Feeling great, I picked up my phone to call my husband and tell him the news. There was a message that turned me cold. "Please find a copy the attached Emergency Motion for Temporary and Permanent Change in Residential Custody."...more

Divorce & Custody: How Do You Survive the First Long Visit?

This will be the first week the boys spend with my estranged husband. We have a custody agreement finished. The financials and such will happen in March. He gets them Fall break. For a week. 7 nights. A week. Now, some might say "Holy CRAP! You are FREEEEEE!" And, I am. No, I don't worry about them being with him. They will be fine. They just won't be with me. Won't. Be. With. Me. ...more
NateG Oh god.....this breaks my heart.  It's all so hard.  For the kids.  For us.  You are a ...more

The Battle for Halloween: Family Holidays After Divorce

He gets the 4th of July, I get Halloween. He gets to light things on fire and cross his fingers that the dogs don't chew a hole through the wall, and I get to make a Dr. Horrible costume and explore haunted houses on North Portsmouth Street with the thousands of people who all of a sudden seem to live in our neighborhood. He gets to spend too much money on garbage that makes noise, and I get to spend $10 on candy that will somehow stay in my house until all of eternity goes by and a new world begins and then my $10 candy is an ancient, preserved, sticky relic (that the kids will still want to eat). But this year he asked if he could have them for Halloween....more
Love that making fantastic memories for your children is included in your decision-making! We do ...more

Why I Cry in My Car Every Wednesday at 6:45am

I wake up on Wednesdays with a pit in my stomach. I hear the alarm go off and I immediately become tearful. I hate Wednesdays. Wednesday is the day that my kids go to their dad’s house until either Friday (which I can barely tolerate) or until Monday (which feels beyond awful). After divorce, there is no perfect custody schedule, and this one was the product of careful deliberation and collaboration. I know that it’s in the best interests of my kids. My attempts at rationalization, however, do nothing to temper the devastating heartbreak that I experience every Wednesday morning. ...more
I have my heart ripped out every Wednesday too. However, the kids only go for a 2 1/2 hour ...more

The Sociopath: I thought it was normal to wonder when my husband would kill me

I'd love for you to read my story at my blog site: ….and I would have thought I deserved it and that my family would be better off without me anyway. I know he wanted to kill me because we would talk about it. I know exactly how he wanted to do it: he would strangle me to feel his power over me and my life. Why in the world did I think that was normal? That desire in him has only increased; I’ve seen it in his eyes....more