I had to share a book I’m reading right now and that every parent going through a divorce absolutely needs to read. The book is Divorce Poison: How to Protect Your Family from Bad-mouthing and Brainwashingby Dr. Richard A....more
My parents separated and divorced when I was in junior high school. Although I am not sure of the exact terms of the custody arrangement, I can say that my brother and I lived with our Mom and visited our Dad for a few weeks during the summer. I am pretty sure this was because we lived in South Carolina and my Dad lived in Indiana. ...more
I have an MA in Psychology and many years of work in large corporations with great jobs. When I had a baby, my ex husband and I agreed that working from home would be the best option since we both had long commutes. I quit my full time well paying job to work part time from home and be a full time stay at home mom. I cooked and cleaned, took care of our child and worked. My ex husband made over 100K a year and came home to a warm dinner each night and a happy, safe, well cared for child....more
<cite>Image: Shutterstock</cite>It was a pretty day and I had just left an interview with a new client. Feeling great, I picked up my phone to call my husband and tell him the news. There was a message that turned me cold. "Please find a copy the attached Emergency Motion for Temporary and Permanent Change in Residential Custody."...more
This will be the first week the boys spend with my estranged husband. We have a custody agreement finished. The financials and such will happen in March.
He gets them Fall break.
For a week.
Now, some might say "Holy CRAP! You are FREEEEEE!" And, I am.
No, I don't worry about them being with him. They will be fine. They just won't be with me.
Won't. Be. With. Me.
He gets the 4th of July, I get Halloween. He gets to light things on fire and cross his fingers that the dogs don't chew a hole through the wall, and I get to make a Dr. Horrible costume and explore haunted houses on North Portsmouth Street with the thousands of people who all of a sudden seem to live in our neighborhood. He gets to spend too much money on garbage that makes noise, and I get to spend $10 on candy that will somehow stay in my house until all of eternity goes by and a new world begins and then my $10 candy is an ancient, preserved, sticky relic (that the kids will still want to eat).
But this year he asked if he could have them for Halloween....more
I wake up on Wednesdays with a pit in my stomach. I hear the alarm go off and I immediately become tearful. I hate Wednesdays. Wednesday is the day that my kids go to their dad’s house until either Friday (which I can barely tolerate) or until Monday (which feels beyond awful). After divorce, there is no perfect custody schedule, and this one was the product of careful deliberation and collaboration. I know that it’s in the best interests of my kids. My attempts at rationalization, however, do nothing to temper the devastating heartbreak that I experience every Wednesday morning.
I'd love for you to read my story at my blog site: www.imarriedasociopath.com
….and I would have thought I deserved it and that my family would be better off without me anyway. I know he wanted to kill me because we would talk about it. I know exactly how he wanted to do it: he would strangle me to feel his power over me and my life. Why in the world did I think that was normal? That desire in him has only increased; I’ve seen it in his eyes....more