My blog is stirring the pot
By lolacc1979 on January 23, 2009
So i just finished talking over the phone with Mr. all goody white boy, he has read my blog and wanted to defend himself, so it was actually a great conversation, he apologized for treating me as if i wasn't smart enough ( actually his excat words were:" we have a great physical connection, but she estimulates me mentally") , ok maybe i overreacted, but in my brain that means:" YOU'RE HOT, BUT NOT REALLY THAT BRILLIANT".
And he apologized and we actually had a great and long conversation, he also made me rethink about this whole issue with Mr. Argentina, and that maybe it wasn't that bad as i thought it was, even though i think about my self as a very smart woman, i'm extremely emotional, and i tend to dramatized things, when there's no need for that, but heck! i'm still pissed off with Mr. Argentina, at least the cheater of the beggining of the year and all goody white boy both apologized, and i was able to really put an end to it my self, i had the opportunity to defend my good name and honor, and god knows i'm extremely opinionated and i hate not being able to give my point of view.
As i finished my conversation with him, i was thinking about the way i cope with my break ups, all the time i wanna be the better person, so i always wish the guys the best of luck and that everything goes well in their life, when deep inside i'm just slowly dying due to the poison of my bitterness, 'cause in those moments what i really want to say is:" i hope everything goes wrong with that bitch you're seeing and i hope your dick falls off",..... but no, it's always best wishes and good luck.
And so i decided to write this blog, 'cause i realised that after hearing so many lies and deception from guys, by me, wishing them good luck, i'm not only lying to them, i'm lying to my self. I need to really get everything out of my chest, and don't let anything up in the air.
As Sarah Jessica Parker has her Mr. Big in sex and the city, i can't be less, and i have my own, i just don't think he knows, CAN SOMEBODY EXPLAIN TO ME WHY I JUST CAN''T GET MR.URUGUAY OUT OF MY FRICKING HEAD????????????. i just constantly think about him, it's very sad, i have to confess that when i went out with M.r Argentina, all i wanted was him sitting in that chair, i wanted him being the one harrasing me with text messages and phone calls. But it only happens in my imagination, we were together for the last time about a month ago, and that nite i couldn't sleep , and by the time he left i was really tired, i said good bye, he told me to behave and he told me to call him later to check what i was doing, well i never did, but he looked at me weird that morning, see, i always wanted to keep my distance from him, never really wanted anything serious, i think last time he thought my dreamy looks at him were of love, but all i wanted him was out so i could finally sleep.
So my dreamy looks i think ended up scaring him off, but as of today he keeps ignoring me, and i'm not really ok with it. Is this why i keep going on dates and wishing HE was there? maybe, i hope.........
But well these has been my reflections for the day i wish you all the best of luck ( just kidding).
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