My Friend Was Killed but you can save your friend

Domestic Violence Hurts

In my 42 years, there are not many things that saddens me, but when I hear of domestic violence and the killing of a wife at the hands of her husband, I get sad. February of this year, my sister childhood friend was killed by her husband. Today, another woman was murdered at her job by her husband. He was upset that she filed for divorce and wanted freedom from his abuse.

The power to change your life is in your hands and the young lady today was trying to take back her power. However, this guy was trying to control her and felt he had lost control. This control is similar to the control rapist feel over their victims. Its all about POWER.

An abuser abuses the victim not because of something the abusee did but most of the time it's due to unresolved issues from the abuser past. The unresolved pain from their past causes them to lash out. Hurt people, hurt people.

Domestic violence is real. People you know suffer in silence.The stigma associated with domestic violence silences the abused. People must learn to let go because real love will not hold a person hostage and physically and/or mentally abuse them.

Many wives and husbands are living in FEAR. God never intended for marriages to be scary, hurt, or a place of murder. Get to a safe place.

If you are abused, take these steps:
1. Create a safety plan
2. Let your employer know you are in danger and to keep the person off the premises
3. Get a restraining order & use it for what its worth

If you don't have anywhere to go, find you a Family Safety Center in your city! Visit Domestic Shelters for help in finding a safe place in your city.

God did not create marriage to be a boxing match for the husband and wife. Do not stay in an abusive relationship. GET OUT. Create you a safety plan, notify the authorities of abuse, get a restraining order and get yourself and your kids to safety.

You cannot leave, come back, leave and comeback. Things will not get better until the abuser gets the necessary help to control their anger. You are worthy of a happy, healthy loving relationship.

I hope I never have to learn that someone in the Still Dating My Spouse community have died at the hands of their spouse. We love each and everyone of you and we promote healthy marriages, but we also know that ABUSE happens. Don't be fooled, God is not pleased!

Domestic violence is not an isolated incident. It affects the community as a whole. Take a stand against against domestic violence!

The National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE).


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