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Sparkle (1)
This is a happy birth story. For all of you expectant mothers who are avoiding people's birth stories for fear of losing your will to deliver, let me say that it is possible to have the birth you hoped for but also, birth is only the beginning! No matter how your birth goes, you will love your baby and he will love you.
I was extremely anxious by December 31, the baby’s due date. I’d been on bed rest in November, as I’d dilated to two centimeters. I’d had my bloody show in early December. The baby was large- apparently about eight pounds at 36 weeks. Every single day in December I woke up and thought, the baby will come today. I had phantom contractions and convinced myself I would give birth early. Every time I had an urge to tidy the house we joked, “it’s time, she’s nesting”! I wanted so badly to have the baby come early, as I was sure he was large and I really wanted a natural childbirth. But an early birth was not to be; in fact, he arrived on January 3, the original due date I’d been given when first pregnant.
On New Year’s Eve, we went out to dinner. My ankles were so swollen I could barely wear socks. I had eggplant caponata because I’d heard eggplant could help bring on labor. I also had two glasses of champagne, figuring it couldn’t hurt. When I went to bed at 12:05 on New Year’s Eve I had no idea what the next day would bring!
At 4:15 am I awoke with a strong cramp. Instantly, I knew this was a contraction. It felt totally different from anything I’d felt before. But it was ok, not too painful. About 45 minutes later I felt warm water in my underwear, followed by another contraction. I was totally wired, and so I lay in bed and watched TV. I felt excited and peaceful at the same time. The water kept coming; any doubts I had about my water breaking were gone. I changed underwear about every hour all day. The contractions were consistently about every half an hour through the afternoon. I lay around in a sense of disbelief and bemusement. Could it finally be happening? It wasn’t so bad.
By the evening of January 1, it was bad! Contractions, though still about 12-15 minutes apart, were viciously strong. I’m grateful to my husband, my doula, and the Hypnobirthing technique for getting me through the following day. I was determined to have a natural childbirth. We hired a doula (Ananda Lowe, who has actually just written a great book called The Doula Guide to Birth). I was group B strep negative and prepared to stay home as long as possible. I didn't call the doctor or hospital at all.
Ananda came over at about 9 pm. I was in agony. All night, she sat beside me on the bed and held me during contractions. She rubbed my back and helped me breathe. Although my husband was amazing, there was something about having another woman to hold me and know what I was going through that really helped. I was so nauseous; I couldn’t eat anything but I drank a lot of fluids from a giant sippy cup. I remember feeling as if the whole world stopped while I was in labor. All that mattered was trying to survive another contraction! And so, the next 18 hours continued: I listed to the Hypnobirthing tapes on repeat, keeping myself in a trance like state. There’s a photo of me in a glider with the cat on my lap and I cannot recall that moment. I truly went into myself; surfing waves of contractions (“surges,” in Hypnobirthing parlance) was all that mattered.
By 7pm on January 2, I’d had a day and a half of strong but far-apart contractions. I just wanted to lie prone but forced myself to move a lot to try to bring them closer together, keeping in mind the “311” rule of when to go to the hospital. But they didn’t come closer with any regularity; I wasn’t at 311 (or even 411). Ananda said I should prepare for another long night of contractions at home since I didn’t seem far dilated. She went home to rest. But my mother wit told me I needed to go to the hospital…now. I got very anxious and said to my
