Top 20 New Year's Resolutions for Moms
1. Don't sleep too much (during the day).
2. Don't play with your kids (until they brush their teeth, eat breakfast, and get dressed).
3. Drink too much (water).
4. Eat all the candy you want (but just pretend candy).
5. Wear fabulous clothes (that someone pays you to model).
6. Take long hikes (in cyberspace).
7. Create a G+ community. (You do know what that is, don't you?)
8. Adopt a puppy from a local shelter. (Yeah, that sounds about right.)
9. Bring your kids to Disneyland (in your dreams, I mean their dreams).
10. Make every Saturday night a date night (with your mom peeps on Facebook).
11. Make a to-do list (of things you DON'T have to do). Do that right now.
12. Turn the TV off and go read a book.
13. Don't even think about cruising Pinterest, unless of course you are looking for good books to read.
14. Don't spend money you don't have. (Don't spend money you do have, unless it's for a dream vacation to Disneyland; isn't there a Pinterest board for that?)
15. Hug a tree (but only if it hugs your first).
16. Have a pillow fight with your kids before they go to bed (after you all play with your new puppy).
17. Crown yourself Super Mom of the year! You just played with your kids, got them a puppy, took them to Disneyland, had a pillow fight, and hugged a tree back. (There must be a Pinterest board for that!)
18. Gather all your empty cardboard boxes, toilet paper rolls, paper bags, soon-to-be recycled newspapers and magazines and make a city with your kids and your new puppy in your living room. (And take a zillion pictures to post on the Internet.)
19. OK, you can hug a tree, regardless of whether it hugs your first. (What?)
20. Print out this list, but not before you pin it on Pinterest, share it on Facebook, posted it to G+, and tweet it on Twitter. (Seriously, what?)
HAVE A HAPPY AND SAFE NEW YEAR!