Why Do Autism "Experts" Say Such Awful Things?

“There is no human life that is more sacred than another—every human life is sacred.” - Pope FrancisYou want to break my heart? Show me the latest mainstream media piece about autism written by or featuring quotes from a non-autistic autism expert. Almost without exception, that expert is going to say something that self-righteously dehumanizes, endangers, invokes pity for, or degrades my autistic son. My beloved, delightful, innocent son—who has done nothing to deserve such scorn.Maybe you can understand, now, why my heart never stops breaking. ...more
MomofTwoGirls Thank you, Eileen. more

Why Do Autism "Experts" Say Such Awful Things?

“There is no human life that is more sacred than another—every human life is sacred.” - Pope FrancisYou want to break my heart? Show me the latest mainstream media piece about autism written by or featuring quotes from a non-autistic autism expert. Almost without exception, that expert is going to say something that self-righteously dehumanizes, endangers, invokes pity for, or degrades my autistic son. My beloved, delightful, innocent son—who has done nothing to deserve such scorn.Maybe you can understand, now, why my heart never stops breaking. ...more
FaceValueComics please do. Thank you. more

My Family of Mushroom Hunters

When my husband said he wanted to take the kids on a neighborhood walk to hunt for mushrooms, I was thrilled. We are friendly, social people, but it hasn't always been easy to make connections on our hillside of eccentrics and Hobbit homes -- I figured visibility could lead to opportunity. Then our twelve-year-old Iz returned from the outing, gleefully brandishing a death cap -- a reportedly delicious mushroom that, if ingested, will liquefy one's liver....more
Update: Craig has enough expertise that we eat our approved foraged mushrooms now, and can't ... more

Changing Conversations: When Parents Murder Disabled Children

Michigan parent Kelli Stapleton recently pled guilty to poisoning her autistic teen daughter Issy. According to police reports, Kelly lured Issy into a van, "drugged her, lit the grills and left the van to get more charcoal while her sleeping daughter breathed in poisonous carbon monoxide fumes." Kelli and Issy both survived the attempted murder-suicide....more
pseudopodia Shannon Des Roches Rosa newzealanditisthen Jess at Diary of a Mom summarized how I ... more

We Cannot Excuse Parents Who Kill Autistic Children

Some members of the autism parenting communities are having a hard time making a critical distinction right now, so let me be clear: Just because you understand how difficult parenting can be does not mean you understand why someone would kill their autistic child. Those two subjects need to be separated by a brick wall. ...more
StacyHuffman I have compassion for anyone going through a tough time. That doesn't excuse ... more

Parenting Kids With Disabilities: How to Get Through Tough Times

When parents like me talk about our kids with disabilities and intense support needs, we have to be thoughtful. We need to make it quite clear that our kids are much-loved and very awesome human beings. We should never, ever state or imply that any challenges we face as a parent are our children's fault. We need to handle their privacy with delicacy. And we shouldn't accidentally enable disrespect towards children who are already too-frequent magnets for morbid fascination, and pity....more
Respect really is key. Thank you for your kind words, Lisa. more

Parenting Kids With Disabilities: How to Get Through Tough Times

When parents like me talk about our kids with disabilities and intense support needs, we have to be thoughtful. We need to make it quite clear that our kids are much-loved and very awesome human beings. We should never, ever state or imply that any challenges we face as a parent are our children's fault. We need to handle their privacy with delicacy. And we shouldn't accidentally enable disrespect towards children who are already too-frequent magnets for morbid fascination, and pity....more
Thank you, Anne. Appreciated. more

Parenting Kids With Disabilities: How to Get Through Tough Times

When parents like me talk about our kids with disabilities and intense support needs, we have to be thoughtful. We need to make it quite clear that our kids are much-loved and very awesome human beings. We should never, ever state or imply that any challenges we face as a parent are our children's fault. We need to handle their privacy with delicacy. And we shouldn't accidentally enable disrespect towards children who are already too-frequent magnets for morbid fascination, and pity....more
Glad to know you have that support! more

Parenting Kids With Disabilities: How to Get Through Tough Times

When parents like me talk about our kids with disabilities and intense support needs, we have to be thoughtful. We need to make it quite clear that our kids are much-loved and very awesome human beings. We should never, ever state or imply that any challenges we face as a parent are our children's fault. We need to handle their privacy with delicacy. And we shouldn't accidentally enable disrespect towards children who are already too-frequent magnets for morbid fascination, and pity....more
TerriEagen-Torkko Really glad you found invaluable support. Sincerely. more

Changing Conversations: When Parents Murder Disabled Children

Michigan parent Kelli Stapleton recently pled guilty to poisoning her autistic teen daughter Issy. According to police reports, Kelly lured Issy into a van, "drugged her, lit the grills and left the van to get more charcoal while her sleeping daughter breathed in poisonous carbon monoxide fumes." Kelli and Issy both survived the attempted murder-suicide....more
Sylvia Phillips I hope you and your daughter get the support you both need. And thank you for ... more