Be Kind: We're All Living in the Gap

She asked for a pencil and paper. We were at my husband's office visiting, and she developed an urgent need for writing implements. We handed them over, and Aaron and I continued our conversation. Then we both noticed that she had one of his books open, and it looked like she might be writing in it! She wasn't. She was copying down the Arabic alphabet from a graph in the book. Her initiative, her drive, her curiosity, her thirst for knowledge and understanding never cease to amaze me. Of course, I took a picture. ...more
Love this! Thank you for talking about the gap. more

I Am NOT My Hair

For my whole life I have always measured my beauty on my hair. When I was a child I wanted long, straight, beautiful "white" hair- which is a tall order considering I have the nappiest, kinkiest hair by nature. So the better part of my childhood was spent in a salon chair, with relaxer in my hair. Once, when I was 13, my mother did an at home relaxing treatment to my hair, and even though it was burning to high heaven- the sign that it's time to wash it out- I just HAD to finishing watching an episode of Frasier; the result, hair- my hair- falling out from the roots and running down the drain. When all was said and done, I was bald 4 inches deep from my hairline. It took years before I could bring myself to watch an episode of Frasier. ...more
I LOVE this! You look fantastic! When I had cut all of my hair off way back when I loved it. It ... more

Does My Child Have to Be Better Because She's Black?

I've had teachers say it to me. Lots of my mentors said it. Once, a supervisor at work mentioned it. I've overheard folks telling their own children, educators telling other people's kids, and I'm sure that I've even said it a time or two in my years of teaching. ...more
MELISASource This! I want my daughter to be able to handle herself anywhere and she does have to ... more

Does My Child Have to Be Better Because She's Black?

I've had teachers say it to me. Lots of my mentors said it. Once, a supervisor at work mentioned it. I've overheard folks telling their own children, educators telling other people's kids, and I'm sure that I've even said it a time or two in my years of teaching. ...more
BrandiJeter I want her to be judged for HER but I do encourage her to be the positive example ... more

Does My Child Have to Be Better Because She's Black?

I've had teachers say it to me. Lots of my mentors said it. Once, a supervisor at work mentioned it. I've overheard folks telling their own children, educators telling other people's kids, and I'm sure that I've even said it a time or two in my years of teaching. ...more
BrandiJeter Oh! Girl you making me think! Seriously, I do tell M that she has to do her best ... more

Does My Child Have to Be Better Because She's Black?

I've had teachers say it to me. Lots of my mentors said it. Once, a supervisor at work mentioned it. I've overheard folks telling their own children, educators telling other people's kids, and I'm sure that I've even said it a time or two in my years of teaching. ...more
This post has been on my mind since I read it yesterday. I have read and re-read this and while ... more

The Other Side of the Weight Spectrum: Being Too Thin

This is not a pity party. I am relatively healthy, of sound mind (albeit occasionally debatable). I love myself, I do. I practice self worth in front of my girls, never complain about my [under]weight. I am happy and free and in love with my body in front of them. Oh, I can give the performance you've never imagined. But inside my head? Ugly. Skinny. Tittyless. Meatless. You're always cold because you don't have enough meat on your bones. No one wants you. Your husband is pretending. Your girls are destined to follow the skinny path. Make them some potatoes. ...more
My kid is rail thin and part of me was so happy that she wouldn't  have to go through the ... more

They Were Making Fun Of My Son, So I....Did Nothing

Where I live, I get the best of both worlds. I'm in a small town riding the edge between the far suburbs of a major US city and the very rural farmland that stretches to the west. I only have to drive an hour and my kids can have museums and touring exhibits and Broadway road shows and concerts and all kinds of culture. ...more
This was a good one. more

Your Kid's Peanut Allergy is an Inconvenience

My oldest son came home from his first week of kindergarten with a letter stating that peanuts and peanut products were not allowed at school. What? He has eaten peanut butter sandwiches every day for years. What am I going to send for MY kid for lunch? He also loves peanut butter chocolate chip granola bars for snacks. What am I going to send for MY kid for a snack? What about MY kid? ...more
My kid has a dairy allergy and it is quite the chore making sure she is dairy free. I understand ... more

Life Beyond The Words "I Don't Love You Anymore"

It was the year 2000 and I was facing one of the worst periods of my life.  In less than two years I'd lost both my father and grandfather.  Thrown into that mix, I was blindsided by the words, "I don't want to be married to you anymore" followed by "I'm seeing someone else". He said these things to me in the convenience of a moving vehicle headed towards a vacation spot I thought we'd  been looking forward to for months....more
When my marriage ended I thought I would never be happy again. I was so depressed and distraught ... more