Can You Even Help Your Kids Gain Independence Today?

The other day, Sam, Alrik, and I wanted to head out to the playground—and Mikko didn't. Now, the playground is literally a block from our home. Mikko is seven years old, nearly eight, and perfectly capable of amusing himself and retrieving drinks or snacks as needed in a short absence of parental supervision. But we knew we couldn't leave him home alone, and told him as much. "But whhhyyyy?" he asked. Indeed, kiddo, why? Because the neighbors might call the cops on us, that's why. ...more
Yes!! I totally agree. I once had someone call CPS on me for "neglect" because I let my children ... more

The Worst Things People Told Me When I Was Pregnant

I am currently 33 weeks pregnant, so hopefully I wont come off sounding like my hormones are doing all of the driving. I enjoy being pregnant. Being pregnant is one of the most amazing experiences one can go through. Amazing in the sense that when you're pregnant you're ready for it to be over, and yet when it's over, you miss it. One of the things I wont miss is hearing the below statements that were often said to me during my three pregnancies. The top ten worst things that were said to me when I was pregnant are: ...more
My 4th was born underwater, I caught him myself. It was beautiful, start to ... more

How Do You Feel About the Dreaded Pop-In?

Just a few weeks ago, I received an unwelcome surprise: At my doorstep appeared the dreaded pop-in. ...more
I am, in a past life, a person made very uncomfortable by pop in visitors. I don't like not ... more

Mommy Blogging Remains a Radical Act

In 2005 at the original BlogHer, Alice Bradley declared mommy blogging a radical act. By 2009, Lindsay Ferrier and others declared that ship sailed....more
Sometimes I forget how much of a lifeline blogging was for me for so long, both the wisdom and ... more

I Knew Him by His First Name: I Grew to Call Him Dad

Percy. I only called him “Dad” selectively, usually when I needed something. My friends marveled that I had the balls to call my dad by his first name. But it wasn’t an act of rebellion; my mom called him Percy and we just parroted what she said. He never seemed to mind. It’s taken years to piece together who Percy really was and how that same Percy intersected with Dad—a title I instinctively started using only after the picture of who he was as a man, as a father, became clearer as I grew older. ...more
beautiful. truly. more

The Day My Third World Self Put My First World Self In Its Place

I was washing a few dishes and enjoying the cold water gushing out from our faucet when from out of the blue, I was reminded of those years in the Philippines when we had a water crisis and some form of water rationing was done in most urban areas. I don't know why I had the thought, but I was suddenly reminded of those days when I would turn on the faucet and nothing would come out of it.  So then I thought to myself, "Oh, I'm using too much water; better turn the faucet down and save some water!" ...more
I live in Thailand right now, and that was one of the hardest things to get used to. There is ... more

For Christian Women Who Have Never Been Divorced

Let me start by saying that until 2009, I was one of you....more
My childhood was spent under the shadow of just such a marriage. It was a huge blow, but also a ... more

Is Shunning Makeup the Key to Gender Equity at Work?

A few weeks ago, I left the house and headed to Aaron Brothers to claim my insanely overpriced but very pretty custom frame. After a few blocks, I looked into the rear view mirror and realized with a start that I'd left the house without a stitch of makeup on....more
I wear makeup probably 4 times a year for a truly special occasion. I never curl, blow dry, or ... more

Housemate-Hunting Is a Little Like Online Dating

Three days after James moved in, we left him on his own in the house for the weekend. The ink was barely dry on our closing papers; we were still unpacking the 65 boxes of books we’d schlepped from Oregon....more
When we were a young couple with small children, post secondary degrees to earn, and tight ... more

Moms in New Jersey Can Now Ban Dads from the Delivery Room

A ruling in New Jersey now allows mothers to ban fathers from the delivery room. Citing privacy laws afforded all patients in choosing who gets to be at their bedside, the judge ruled in favor of Rebecca Deluccia by allowing her to keep Steven Plotnick out of the room. Honestly, I didn't think this was even an issue. Surely mothers in labor can choose who is and is not allowed in the room, right? ...more
I"m still waiting for a woman to be able to kick out doctors and nurses that she doesn't like in ... more