Our Experience With Orphan Fever: A Reflection on my Daughter's 13th Birthday

  When I met her, she seemed so far from this moment. She was at once a tiny wisp of a child and a solid soul, far smaller than her 22 months, but far clearer on her needs and wants, what she would surrender and what she would fight ardently to gain. She called me "Mamma" so easily. I wanted nothing more than to hear that title over and over again....more

The Happiness Fallacy

I have come to the conclusion that we have it all wrong, the notion of happiness as our goal in life. It's too blurry a goal, not to mention entirely self-serving.In raising and learning with my children, I confess that my greatest delinquency has been considering their happiness above all else. Now, with three pre-teens (one dangerously close to 13), I can see that such a goal has led to an embarrassing amount of ergophobia (fear of work) around here....more
@JennaHatfield It took me a while to opt out of the fallacy, I am ashamed to say. I really came ...more

Top 20 Things I Wish I Had Known About Parenting Before I Became a Parent

My cousin's kid is about to have a baby.  Her brother did it a year or so ago.  I remember when they themselves were born.  For some reason, their entrée into parenting has touched me more than I would imagine.  I am guessing it's because my cousin and his wife were and are such great parents.  In fact, I have always held them up as the ideal parents.Having been partially around the parenting block now, I can assume that, as easy as they made it seem, my cousins anguished over parenting as much as anyone else.  They just didn't always show it....more

De-cluttering Relationships

I recently poked holes in my bucket list and had to let a hard one flow out: Be a close friend with acquaintances with whom I am not already a close friend.  I do so like to be liked....more

Hole-in-my-bucket List

How does a person re-invent herself without a publicist, a team, and a reality show?I could start big and lose 10% or so (35%?) of my body weight or trade in my mini-van for a hybrid....more
 @lakeschooling That is awesome! more

In Lieu of a Midlife Crisis

I have turned the age my father was when he died of a massive heart attack.  His first symptom was death.  Do you know what this does to the psyche of a partial hypochondriac?  I'll tell you what it does.   It causes one to occasionally curl up in the fetal position awaiting death the way a pregnant woman awaits labor.  "Is this it?  Was that a fleck of plaque clogging my artery or a sore muscle from my push-up this morning?"  (Yes, I meant to write push-up singularly.  If you can write it plural, bully for you.)...more

I Make My Kids Clean; Can I Still Call Myself an Attachment Parent?

I make my kids clean up the house, as much as one can make three fiercely independent, free-thinking children do anything. And here's why: 1. They live here. 2. They make 98.7% of the messes. 3. They live here. 4. Every member of our house functions better when it is clean. 5. They live here. 6. I am not their servant. 7. They live here rent free. Go ahead -- flame me! Kick me out of attachment parenting....more
My kids clean with me. I thought attachment parenting was about giving your kids tools to deal ...more

On Sex and the Teenager

There was a provocative blog post on BlogHer recently about a parent's role in the sex life of their teenager.  The author advocated tacit acquiescence, assuming that the teen is going to be sexually active and treating him or her as such, complete with education -- but discreetly....more

The Food Rant

I am annoyed, supremely annoyed.  Though I would love to present my voice in a more gentle, polite manner regarding this issue, I am afraid that I find it impossible to do so.I am tired of swimming upstream on the issue of healthy food vs. junk food!...more

Encouraging the Young Artist

In response to my recent post about art, a commenter on my blog's Facebook Page asked how I motivate my kids to create so much art.  The question left me chuckling because there are times, of which I am not proud, when I wish they would create just a little less art.  It's not that I begrudge them their artistic sides....more