Sexual Assault: Years Later, It Still Hurts

As a child, whenever you were outside playing and fell off your bike, or fell down as you were running down the block…chances are you ran inside crying, where your mom or dad would say: "What happened? Where does it hurt?" Chances are, a little antiseptic a Band-Aid and a hug (and a little nudge) to get back out there and play is enough to dry your tears and get back in the game. ...more
O very well said. All of it. Right on. And I am sorry you suffered this kind of abuse as a ... more

June is PTSD Month /EMDR, an effective treatment for PTSD in sexual abuse survivors

 from my book, Enfolded in Silence/A Story in Art of Healing from Sexual Trauma in Childhood ( :...more
Dr E First, I am sorry you were sexually abused. I so agree both that we have to face our abuse ... more

Making the Case for the Female Condom

The female condom is getting a lot of flak lately, and I don’t see what the problem is. I love this little nitrile doohickey more than I love a lot of things, such as accidental pregnancy or contracting STDs or STIs. There’s a reason that they are at the top of our list of Spiciest Condoms On the Market. ...more
Sounds great to me. How effective it it percentage wise? more

Would You Remove Your Cast Before Your Broken Arm Is Healed?

My dad asked me this the other day after he read my previous blog post, "Journey in Trying to Calm the Hell Down."  He was concerned when he saw that I was getting anxious about returning to work.  He was concerned that all the effort I've put in during the past few weeks to calm my mind and gut down would all go to hell if I boarded the anxiety train again.  He asked me not to worry about returning to work, in that he meant for me not to return to work.  He again told me to fuck everything, (when I...more
I like your post. I am glad you are taking more time to heal. It took me a long time to heal ... more

A Woman, Phenomenally: What Maya Angelou Taught Me

There’s an accusation, especially recently in our culture, about people who fight for social justice. We’re accused of perpetuating a victim mentality. People mistake our stories and our experiences for manifestations of victimhood. We’re told not to wallow. We’re told to rise above, and in many cases, to put aside and forget our experiences almost as if they don’t matter at all.In times when I am accused of these things, I like to remember Maya Angelou....more
I join you in being inspired by Maya Angelou. Thank you for this testimonial. I am a survivor of ... more

Remembering Yuri Kochiyama, Civil Rights Activist

Civil rights activist Yuri Kochiyama passed away over the weekend at the age of 93. But sadly, outside of the Asian American and Black Power activism communities, she is not well known. You may recognize Kochiyama as the woman in the cat-eye glasses next to Malcolm X after he was fatally shotin 1965. ...more
Yes, thank you for remembering her. It sounds like she was a powerful voice for justice. You ... more

Life After Weight-Loss Surgery: Are You Going To Eat That?

Isn’t it funny when people becomes experts in everything about your life when you make major changes? Of course, by “funny” I mean “as annoying as something could possibly be” because there is nothing remotely humorous about the ways in which people try to convince themselves and you that they know what’s best for you. “Concern trolling” is the phrase coined to describe when people give you unsolicited, often critical or snarky advice about what you should do “for your health” or whatever other benefit....more
I have lots of unhelpful advice about recovering from child sexual abuse. People want you to ... more

Do Small Things

When I was in university, I wanted to carry out something great, heroic even. Like all young people, I wanted to make a difference in the world. After spending 18 years pregnant and/or nursing, I have done nothing noteworthy. Yet I intuitively understand that by mothering, by doing simple things, I have changed the world....more
I appreciated your blog post. Doing small things with gusto makes so much sense. I do art, and ... more

The Secret to Embracing Overwhelm

Birthdays are the perfect time for thought. I turned 34 on Saturday. No trumpets. No fancy cake. Just a lot of reflection....more
Wisdom from you. Thanks for this blog post. Making lists always helps my overwhelm. It's so ... more

Mammograms and the Fear of No Future

"If the hardest thing I have to do today is remember not to put on deodorant, this will be a good day." I hate mammograms. Every time I "pass" one, I feel I've been granted another year to live. I go into the screening tense and sober; I leave relieved. At least, I always have. Except once. ...more
Beautiful. I get anxious about the future but God usually brings me back. But I still hate ... more