I Can’t Handle Ordering Lunch at Panera

On the rare days that I leave work to pick up lunch, I always drive past Panera Bread and briefly consider it for a moment. ...more

A Letter to My Awkward Middle School Self

Dear Janel, Greetings from 2015! Dude, let me tell you — the future is CUCKOO BANANAS. ...more

Getting Older

This year I’ll turn 35. ...more

Found Out

I spent the day before Mother’s Day at home with my kids, which would normally be awesome except that I mostly spent it dealing with all four of Bella’s major meltdowns. ...more

A Portrait of the Blogger as a Hand-Waving Maniac

That’s me, in the bottom-left corner. ...more

I Still Just Want You to Buy This Book

OMG I’M IN A BOOK AGAIN THIS SHIT IS UNREAL EVERYONE. Remember when I got all pumped up because I had been included in I Just Want to Be Alone (I Just Want to Pee Alone) (Volume 2)?...more

They See Me Rollin’, They Hatin’.

A few weeks ago, I traded in the car I’ve owned for the past ten years for a minivan. ...more

Sorry, Not Sorry

A few months after Bella was diagnosed with autism, I was on the phone with my health...more

Dumb Stuff I Have Bought on Amazon (and One Really Cool Thing)

Do you want to know the main reason Christmas gets on my nerves? ...more