An Adoptive Mom Speaks: Who Is Looking Out for Baby Veronica's Best Interest?

As an adoptive parent and an adoption professional who works in the foster care system, I have been very interested in the case of "baby" Veronica since it's inception almost four years ago. I have followed the ins and outs, ups and downs. I've read articles, court briefs, and blog posts. I don't watch TV news and in a way I think that may be a good thing here. I have no preconceived notions about either party based on their demeanor or media slant based on what network aired the interview(s). ...more
"So what is my point? My point is that there needs to be some element of what is best for ... more

An Adoptive Mom Speaks: Who Is Looking Out for Baby Veronica's Best Interest?

As an adoptive parent and an adoption professional who works in the foster care system, I have been very interested in the case of "baby" Veronica since it's inception almost four years ago. I have followed the ins and outs, ups and downs. I've read articles, court briefs, and blog posts. I don't watch TV news and in a way I think that may be a good thing here. I have no preconceived notions about either party based on their demeanor or media slant based on what network aired the interview(s). ...more
Why should Veronica have to "compromise"?   She does not need genetic strangers to split her ... more

"Baby" Veronica Is Growing Up: ICWA, 2 Families, & Now an Arrest

After the Supreme Court decided against a biological father in the so-called “Baby Veronica” case two months ago, I found myself worried not just for the family in the case, but for adoption in general. Adoption is riddled with misunderstanding and the mainstream media tends to exacerbate the problem rather than clarifying. ...more
Sorry for the grammatical and spelling errors in my last post.  My computer was not working ... more

"Baby" Veronica Is Growing Up: ICWA, 2 Families, & Now an Arrest

After the Supreme Court decided against a biological father in the so-called “Baby Veronica” case two months ago, I found myself worried not just for the family in the case, but for adoption in general. Adoption is riddled with misunderstanding and the mainstream media tends to exacerbate the problem rather than clarifying. ...more
Until money and marketing is removed from adoption, it will continue to create an environment ... more

In Praise of Aunts

First of all, let me start by saying that this post is not intended as a slight to uncles, who can be pretty awesome, too. I just happen to have aunts on my mind today because one of mine is approaching a milestone birthday. I'll tell you about her later in this post. First I want to highlight my great aunt Georgie. Though I never met this aunt of my mother's (she died before I was born), I am connected to her by an almost-naming. Let me explain....more
I am reunited with my Aunt Patty who has a birthday this month...wonderful reminder of the love ... more

Abandoned Babies & Terrible Mothers: Media Coverage Bias

A tragedy has unfolded in my city. Last week, a six-month-old baby (who was black) was found in the hallway of an apartment complex, strapped into his car seat, healthy but alone. The media reported that the baby was found there with no clues to his identity or how he came to be alone in an apartment complex. The comments quickly filled up with thoughts like this, from Marilyn Williams:...more
I agree...it is because of the baby-hungry adoption mentality in this country.  Very sad.  ... more

A Letter to Our Child: You Were Not Our Second Choice

You were always part of our family plan. And as life has probably already taught you, life takes our “plans” and laughs at them. We are thrown challenges, changes, and so many curve-balls. Our well thought out plans become nothing but memories. Things that we believe to be true are not. Things that seem easy can become so very hard. Life is like that....more
When you think about it, adoption is always a second choice.  Always.  Nature calls for mothers ... more

Why I've Been Avoiding My Spiritual Community

For the past 10 years, I've been a part of a spiritual community that both nurtures and inspires me. I have been an active volunteer in this congregation. I have felt strong connections to the people there. I married my husband in the sanctuary. A few years ago when asked in a meditation workshop to close my eyes and think of a place where I belonged, it was the building where this congregation gathers that came into my mind.So why haven't I been there in several months? ...more
Beautiful article, Rebecca, and so true for many, many adopted people, including myself.  ... more

Honesty in National Adoption Awareness Month

November is National Adoption Awareness Month. Historically, the purpose was to draw attention to children in foster care and their need for permanency. Bravo to then Governor Dukakis in 1976 for getting things moving.Today, the campaign is used widely and for a host of opportunists—whether it’s an unethical agency trying to increase revenue or Petsmart promoting pet adoption. We’ve blurred the intention of adoption awareness and moved, in many ways, the wrong direction....more
Excellent article Susan!  As a fellow adult adoptee and member of American Adoption Congress, it ... more

New Reality Show, I'm Having Their Baby, Falls Short

I wasn't going to acknowledge OXYGEN's new "reality" show, I'm Having Their Baby. I deleted emails and avoided the subject as a whole. Ignoring the show doesn't make it go away, much like the denial of grief and loss doesn't magically make a birth mother happy and whole again, so I decided to take one for the team and watch the screeners of the show which premieres next Monday, July 23, 2012. There were some good things, there were lots of bad things and, when it comes down to it, adoption reform now needs to encompass the way "reality" shows portray adoption, because they sure aren't doing our efforts any favors....more
When is it ethical for a business to be allowed to "serve" their consumers (adoptive parents) ... more