A Debt-Free Love Story: How One Couple’s Promise to Stop Using Credit Cards Rekindled Everything

There was this fight over money between us.  It wasn’t an overt fight—we weren’t screamers and we didn’t like to argue—but it was there, permeating the room all the time like a poisonous gas, sightless and scentless but lethal just the same.  It infected everything.  It was a silent-treatment standoff of a fight over who wasn’t earning enough, which of our money choices was making the relationship unstable, and which of us was to blame for our debt and the reverberating mess....more

The B.S. of 'Do What You Love and the Money Will Follow,' Or, How to be Creative without Losing Your Mind or Your Shirt

Just after I turned 40 I did something that would change my life forever.  I ran up a huge amount of credit card debt to fund a music CD, a labor of love that was supposed to save me from ever needing a day job again. ...more

Job Loss, Debt, and Lower Salaries: Why We’ve Gotta Do What We’ve Gotta Do

Just recently I read a couple of disturbing articles in the New York Times about debt. Helaine Olen’s January 2nd opinion column suggests that the reason we’re in debt and can’t save is because of unaddressed social policy issues -— things like flat-lined salaries and higher health care costs. ...more
Finally someone with some sense. I have been laid off 2 times on the past 5 years so I know it ...more

"Lemon-Stock”: America’s Investment in Debt Futures

When I was a kid we had a phrase for stuff that fell apart, or things we bought that turned out to be no good.  “It’s a lemon,” my father would say about a bad used car.  “That thing’s a lemon!” my grandmother would say about a new bike that fell apart.  And the joke was supposed to be on the person who bought the thing, and we laughed—not so supportively—over their foolishness or, when we had done the buying, our own.    ...more

Debt-Stress: The Pressure-Cooker Stew That’s Killing Us

The other day I was on a hike with friends of mine who were bemoaning the fact that they were taking on large—no, rewrite that, huge— amounts of debt to put their son through a very expensive private college.  Eight years ago they also bought a very pricey house and the pressure, by their account, was “killing them.” “When we bought this house I was worried we’d end up being ‘house-poor.’  And I was right,” the woman said.  “So now we’ve got a too-expensive house, no money for our son’s college, and a tuition bill that would knock you over.”...more

Three Birds to Change a Paradigm, Or, How to Talk To Your Partner About Debt and Money Issues

So you’ve admitted that they two of you have a problem.  You’ve got high-level debt or even low-ticket-but-annoying debt balances that are ruining your ability to relax, to have a good time, to enjoy each other.  There may have been hardships in your partnership, like a job loss or an upside-down home loan that you’re crawling out from under. ...more

The Aphrodisiac Quality of a Couples Spending Plan

Yes, you’re reading that headline dead-on.  Having a Spending Plan for the two of you is an absolute, mind-blowing aphrodisiac.  It’s what?  You say.  What on God’s green earth does money have to do with our sensual life?I say, it has everything to do with sex.You’ll think I’m blowing smoke about this, but I’m not.  I’m straight-up about the incredible power of money clarity in our relationships and what it will do for our intimate life.  ...more

Debt Will Kill Your Sex Life

Debt will kill your sex life.  No kidding, no joke, and no screwing around here -— pardon the pun -— it really, really will.  If you’re in an intimate relationship with another human being with whom you have regular or committed contact, debt is going to take a toll, and that toll is going to make you pay exactly where you don’t want to -— in the bedroom. ...more
Completely true and the under lying reason I finished with my ex.  However I will keep this ...more

Stoned, Baked and High: When Debting is Our Drug

Stoned, Baked and High:  When Debting is Our DrugIt took a long time for me to admit that I was in terrible trouble with debt—that debt had become a constant, central part of my adult life and my debt-free days had truly been a figment of my imagination—a non-existent blip on my life’s money screen. Certainly I could rationalize that I had been debt-free a few times in the course of my adulthood—but a car accident payoff or a settlement that paid off my credit cards does not financial stability make and I knew it. ...more

Giving Up the Couples' Roller Coaster Ride of Money Vagueness

So you say you can’t keep track of your money because you’re a couple? “He always…” and “She never…” and all of those excuses that get you nowhere? And if you’re both spiraling in debt, any conversation about your joint money troubles usually turns into a hellish blaming-and–shaming session—in other words, a fight....more