On Refusing to Allow Viola Davis' Talent To Be Limited By Racial Commentary

No matter our professional and personal and societal accomplishments as black women, we will be seen as less than. No matter the strides we make beyond being maids, we will be seen as less than. We will be qualified with “for a black woman.” That’s a beautiful painting for a black woman. She’s an incredible dancer for a black woman. Image: © Lisa O'Connor/ZUMAPRESS.com ...more
I'm guessing faces will have to be stuck rather repeatedly.more

What's In a (Starbucks) Name?

Amoeba. Armenia. Ambibia. Ar-na-by...what's your name, baby? It's rare for someone to say my name correctly on the first try. It happens, but it's rare. I've been called all of those above and a few others that make less sense. And by less sense I mean less sense of a seemingly normal person who thought Amoeba could be correct. ...more
I get misspellings all the time too. I'm most commonly named Brittany or Brenda. Or an extra ...more

The Other Side of the Weight Spectrum: Being Too Thin

This is not a pity party. I am relatively healthy, of sound mind (albeit occasionally debatable). I love myself, I do. I practice self worth in front of my girls, never complain about my [under]weight. I am happy and free and in love with my body in front of them. Oh, I can give the performance you've never imagined. But inside my head? Ugly. Skinny. Tittyless. Meatless. You're always cold because you don't have enough meat on your bones. No one wants you. Your husband is pretending. Your girls are destined to follow the skinny path. Make them some potatoes. ...more
Love, love this. Doesn't matter which you feel, too thin (you) or too fat (me), it's valid and ...more

I Did Nothing While She Hurled Abuses At Them

I imagined her saying I don't need your help. Truth be told, I didn't have anything to help her with other than maybe talking to her kids while she zoned out for a while. My daughter and I got on the bus, our first day of catching it together. Our first day of her getting off and transferring to another to go to school; me staying on to get on the subway, me staying on to watch her walk to a bus stop that leaves a lot to be desired as far as safety. Please pay attention to your surroundings. Please. ...more
Well said and described. the torn anxiety, the anger, the sorrow and the helplessness in the ...more

Sometimes: A List of Indulgences

Editor's Note: We spend so much of our days and nights 'being productive', meeting obligations and doing what is expected of us. But sometimes, wouldn't it be nice to do exactly what you feel? --HeatherSometimes I want to sing on the subway just to see who’ll join me.Sometimes I spend a whole day at work not speaking to another person, instead listening to Citizen Cope or Corinne Bailey Rae or Maze or Stevie Wonder or Adele or Luther....more
Sometimes I spend a ridiculous amount of time letting my kids do ferberts on my squishy belly.more

Guest posting at Mama’s Comfort Camp

Community. It’s as important to one’s sanity during motherhood as lots of chocolate. Having a supportive external community, one outside of our family and friends is necessary since sometimes the people closest to you are the ones you can’t really tell that you sometimes (OK, often) hide from your kids. Being able to go someplace online to meet and talk to like minded women who share your fears, your dreams, your hopes, and perhaps your love of bad TV, all without ...more


Sometimes, I watch “Shrek” or “Megamind” or “Finding Nemo” or All The Cartoons Or Movies For Kids even when the kids aren’t home. And I laugh. And then I use lines from the movies regularly. In regular conversation. With adults. Olo. Sometimes, I hate when people write in sentence fragments so much that I’ll stop reading. And then I do it too. Sometimes, at work meetings, I have silly thoughts while trying to listen.  It’s hard not to giggle ....more

And Then I Auditioned for LTYM DC While I Had Alcohol Poisoning

I probably didn’t have alcohol poisoning and I doubt anyone slipped me a roofie. Unlike my husband, who says it was probably the 17 drinks I had, I am pretty sure I only had about 12. Vodka. Why can’t I quit you? (Or tequila. Or whiskey. Or rum. OR RIPPLE IF IT’S OFFERED.) ...more

Wordful Wednesday: The Power of Friendship

My husband and I have been married nearly 11 years. Met in ’93, out of wedlock babe in non-apocalyptic Y2K born, house in ’01, I Do in 2000, bam! you’re all caught up. Please note that in the event of divorce, all music — CDs, 45s, 12-inch VINYL RECORDS HOLY SHIT THERE’S IRENE CARA — are mine*. I love him more than fried fish on Fridays with smashed up Wonder Bread sweating in a baggie. He saves me daily with his ability to ...more


Sometimes, I want to ask an official at the gas, water, or electric company to switch houses with me so each can see how preposterous the bills are: gas — still cold; water — when was the last time I showered?; electric — ain’t nothing on! Sometimes, I eavesdrop on my neighbors. Sometimes, I put on makeup when I have nowhere to go. Sometimes, I wear the same black pants three times a week. They’re black. I have several pair ...more